you in this apartment the whole time.”
I smiled at that. “Oh you do, huh?”
He bent down and kissed my nose. “Yes, I do. I love you. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
I watched him walk out of my room and a second later heard my front door close. I stretched on my bed, loving the way my muscles were so relaxed. I knew who was responsible for that and I couldn’t wait for him to come back.
After eating breakfast and taking a shower, I put on some jeans and a t-shirt and decided to forgo make up. Since Ethan had told me he planned on keeping me in my apartment all weekend, I didn’t see the need to glam myself up. Just the thought of what he’d do to me when he got back made me shiver in anticipation.
With nothing much to do, thoughts of Paul and leaving my job popped in my head. I was heartbroken to be leaving Pierce Homes, especially after we’d just secured Mr. Halliday, but I knew I had no other choice. Too much had happened to be able to work things out. I was done.
The knock at the door startled me and I jumped. I knew it wasn’t Ethan and the dread I felt told me who it was. I wasn’t surprised he’d come over, but I also didn’t want to face him at the moment. I walked to the door and my suspicion was confirmed when I saw Paul outside the peephole. He looked terrible. I took a deep breath and opened the door.
He looked at me, his eyes heavy, his expression serious. He ran a hand through his hair. “Hey,” he said, “Sorry I didn’t call, but I had to see you.”
I opened the door wider to let him in, not surprised he was here. He came in and stood by the couch. I shut the door and turned to face him. My palms started sweating, so I wiped them on my jeans. I felt cold inside, knowing what I had to do.
“It’s okay,” I told him. “How are you?”
“I’ve already lost you, haven’t I?” he asked, ignoring my question.
He shoved his hands in his jeans pockets, waiting for my answer. I shoved off of the door and went to the couch to sit down. He turned to face me, staying where he was.
“Paul, listen,” I started, but he interrupted me.
“Dammit!” he yelled, shoving his hands through his hair. I sat there nervous, not daring to say anything else. He started pacing back and forth, his hands now behind his neck. He stopped and looked at me.
“I could feel it, I could feel you slipping away from me. I knew I’d lost you as soon as Casey spoke. I knew it.” He walked over to me, dropping on his knee. He raised his hand to my face, brushing my cheek with the backs of his fingers. “Aly, please, listen to me. Nothing has changed. My feelings for you are just as strong, stronger. If she’s telling the truth and it is my baby, I’ll take care of the child, but I will not marry her. I cannot be with somebody I don’t love.”
I knew he meant what he just said, but it didn’t matter any more. I had to let him go. It killed me more than I realized to have to do this, but the memory of what he did, and how it had created a child, gave me the courage I needed. When I reached out and brushed a chocolate strand away from his face, he closed his eyes at my touch, putting his hand over mine. He turned it over and kissed my palm. His eyes looked at me with love and fear. I hated that I was going to hurt him.
“I’m so sorry but I can’t be with you, for so many reasons. I can’t be in the way of a child’s future, Paul. I can’t.” He started shaking his head, but I placed my finger on his lips, stopping him. “If we’re honest with each other, everything changed when you had sex with her in your office. There’s no way to recover from that, at least not for me, and I see that now. And the fact that it created a child...there is no way I can be involved in that. Everything has always been stacked against us, Paul. It’s never been easy and I can’t live like that anymore. I can’t always be wondering