taller, even more sexy than I remember. A frisson of awareness of his primal male body covering mine rushes through me to a point of pain.
But his eyes, that were once so expressive with emotions he allowed himself to feel, are all but empty and hard now.
And all I can do is see myself in those dark eyes. I can resonate with that darkness, I can feel myself in the depth of his coldness and that…scares the crap out of me.
“Let me go,” I choke out, my eyes watering. “You’re hurting me.”
He eases his grip just a little bit, but he doesn’t let go.
“Finish what you were about to say,” he growls, like a caged animal that wants to do irreparable damage to my soul.
As we stare at each other in the dimly lit space between us, with trees all around us, blocking us from the view of prying eyes, I’m sucked into the vortex of his anger, hatred, and lust that he weaves.
Liam is sexy, sure, but he’s got nothing on his older brother. Dark hair, a face chiseled by God himself, with a strong jaw that I want to touch, kissable lips that I can’t look away from because I want to kiss him again. A shiver of lust races up and down my spine as I stare up into in tormented eyes.
“Julian—,” I start but he cuts me off with a low, menacing growl.
“Don’t say my fucking name like you deserve it,” he grits out, each word dripping with anger; my heart aches with it. “You’re nothing to me.”
That stings. A lot.
But I won’t let him see that.
“Don’t touch me either.” I struggle to get away from him, hoping that someone is coming to check on me, but he doesn’t move, and he’s not worried about anyone coming. “You don’t have a right to touch me.”
“Like you slapped my brother?” He leans in closer, just as his knee separates my thighs in one fluid move. “Like you kissed him and touched him?”
I tremble just a little bit, remembering the way he shattered the beer bottle in that room in Malibu. I remember the way he was standing in the doorway of the balcony, breathing hard and deep like he is now.
He’s large, with perfect bone structure, tight and toned without an inch of give or fat anywhere on him. He’s so male and so damn built, perfect for the defense lineman position that he plays so well, hell, he was picked by several Division 1 schools. No one knows which one he chose of course, because everything about him is secretive, lethal, silent. At least, that’s what they say about him.
But as we stare at each other, I can’t help but feel that people don’t know him as well as they think.
Liam might be mean and a smart talker, but Julian is a nightmare all on his own.
A chilly shudder moves through me and into him like an electric current, followed closely by a bucket of ice water, drenching us back into the reality of how fucked up we both are.
We both freeze. I frown and his eyes narrow on me.
“Listen, I didn’t mean for that to happen with Liam.” I stutter, my nipples hard, brushing against his hard chest like a cat in heat. I don’t mean to, but I need warmth and he’s so damn warm, I can’t help but want to be closer to him. He watches me, knowing exactly what’s going on with me. My cheeks warm up in embarrassment when his pupils dilate.
“Yeah, you did,” he counters. “You knew exactly what you were doing.”
In that moment, it feels like we’re talking about something else entirely, but I refuse to go there, especially when he won’t hear my side of the mess. Not now.
“Your brother provoked me!” I start, my anger returning tenfold. “I didn’t walk up to him and start shit with him that I couldn’t handle.”
“Neither did Aiden.”
Those three words kill me right then and there.
It’s then that I notice the grief intertwined with the hate in his eyes. I noticed it in Liam’s eyes too just now and it shatters something in me that I’m left almost panting.
We’re standing in the dark. There’s no way that anyone’s emotions can be this…brazen and so damn real, it chokes the air out of me. My lungs tighten, I can’t breathe without feeling the grief in him, all the while feeling the impending grief I’m yet to face.
Soon.
He breathes slowly, deep and so