all. When was the last time Jayden had cried?
“I’ll tell Adeline to mention it to William.” Gray grabbed some paper towels and went to wipe the dirty footprints off the floor in the living room.
“The counselor, right?” Darius asked.
Gray nodded. “He’s the one who recommended the psychologist I’m supposed to go to.”
“Which you haven’t.”
“We’ve talked on the phone,” Gray defended. “I’ll get to it.”
Darius chuckled quietly. “I’ve heard that before.” He made a face. “I’ve said it too.”
Exactly. He was the last guy who could get on Gray’s case about therapy, considering the years of sessions Darius had ignored.
Gray’s situation was different. He was doing everything he was supposed to. He talked about his nightmares with Darius, he was starting to listen to himself and pick up the signals for when he was getting overwhelmed, he was taking shit slowly, and he took his anxiety meds if he had to. With Darius, Gray could talk about everything because they’d been through it together.
“I don’t think a shrink can help me more than you already do,” he admitted, bringing the dirty paper towels back to the kitchen. “You know what I’ve been through.”
“Not all of it,” Darius pointed out patiently. “Therapy ain’t just about talking, knucklehead. The head doctor will help you work through triggers and make sure your mind heals properly. Like a doctor ensuring a fractured leg heals right. Otherwise, resetting it is gonna hurt like a motherfucker.”
Oh, so he had to come here and be all logical. Fuck that.
Gray checked the milk and stuck his pinkie finger in to see if it was hot enough. Ouch—it was. He poured a few spoonfuls of cocoa into the pan, then some sugar.
As he stirred the cocoa, he glanced over at Darius and Jayden, ready to make a deal. “When we’ve found Jackie, we’ll both go to therapy. Okay?”
“Fine.” Darius shrugged, more focused on Jayden. “How’re you feeling, buddy?”
He sniffled and shook his head. His cheek rested on Darius’s chest, and he had his eyes closed.
“Not ready to talk yet?” Darius murmured.
Jayden shook his head again.
Gray swallowed uneasily and wondered how the hell Darius could be so wonderful with the boy and not fall head over heels in love with the dynamic they shared here.
Gray was lost, that was for certain. In the midst of nightmares and anxiety, he lived the dream and only feared the day he had to wake up. This was what he wanted with every fiber of his being.
“Do you have to go camping tomorrow?” Jayden croaked.
To Gray’s surprise, Darius didn’t miss a beat.
“No, we don’t.” He gave Jayden a big squeeze and pressed his lips to the top of his head. “We can wait a couple days.”
“What about the aquarium, Jayden?” Gray wanted to make sure the kid didn’t miss out on something fun.
“You can’t fish there,” Jayden muttered. “You just look at the fish.”
Gray stifled his laugh with his head in the fridge while he grabbed the heavy cream.
Darius didn’t stifle crap. He laughed gruffly and said he’d have to tell his pop about that one.
“You’re funny,” he told Jayden. “So, we do something else tomorrow. Gray’s brothers have been asking him to come to the hockey rink after practice sometime.” Oh, that sneaky fucking bastard. Darius was taking the opportunity to make Gray leave the cabin more. He turned to Gray with a casual expression. “You think Gabriel and Gideon have practice tomorrow?”
Very funny. The twins had practice every damn day, and Darius knew it.
It’d been Mom’s idea. Gabriel and Gid had asked Gray to come by with his gear when they’d have the rink to themselves, and Mom had suggested Gray could bring Jayden. Who she really wanted to meet. Gray hadn’t mentioned anything about a future adoption, but given how much he talked about him… Yeah, she wasn’t stupid.
“I know how to ice-skate a little,” Jayden claimed and wiped his nose on his arm. “Malley and the others took us to a rink once. It was outside in the winter. I liked it.”
“It’s settled, then,” Darius said. “We’ll all go to the rink tomorrow.” He looked over at Gray again. “You think you can pull some strings so we could go earlier? I’m guessing it’ll be pretty late if we go after the last practice.”
Gray gnashed his teeth, plugged in the hand mixer, and drowned Darius out by beating the cream.
Of course he could pull strings. He knew what the schedule looked like.
He also knew he would have to come face-to-face with