not in our cosy Suffolk town on its biggest racing day of the year. Would it, I wondered, ever be the same again?
I glanced through the rest of the paper to see if there was any more information that I had missed. On page five, in inch-high bold type, another headline ran: ‘RACING FOLK POISONED BY THE HAY NET – ONE DEAD’.
Oh shit!
The story beneath was not totally accurate and had probably been pulled together with a considerable amount of guesswork, but it was close enough to the truth to be damaging. It claimed that two hundred and fifty racing guests at a dinner had been poisoned by the Hay Net kitchen with celebrity chef Max Moreton at the cooker. It further claimed that one person had died and fifteen others had been hospitalized. The Hay Net, it stated, had been closed for decontamination. The tone of the piece was distinctly unpleasant.
Alongside the article was a photograph of my roadside restaurant sign with its large ‘KEEP OUT – CLOSED FOR DECONTAMINATION’ sticker prominently displayed at an angle across the all-too-clearly recognizable ‘The Hay Net Restaurant’ wording beneath.
Oh shit, I thought again. That really won’t be great for business.
CHAPTER 5
True to her word, Angela Milne moved mountains to get an inspection of my kitchen done late on Monday afternoon. The inspector, a small man in a suit with dark-rimmed glasses, arrived at about a quarter to five and stood in the car park putting on a white coat and a white mesh trilby hat.
‘Hello,’ he said as I went out to meet him. ‘My name is Ward. James Ward.’ He held out his hand and I shook it. I half expected him to inspect his palm to see if I had left some dirty scrap behind, but he didn’t.
‘Max Moreton,’ I said.
‘Yes,’ he said, ‘I know. I’ve seen you on the telly.’
He smiled. Things might be looking up.
‘Now,’ he said, ‘where’s this kitchen?’
I waved a hand and we crunched across the gravel towards the back door.
‘Have you got the keys?’ I asked.
‘What keys?’ he said.
Things were not looking up that much.
‘The keys for the padlocks,’ I said. ‘The two men who came and put this lot on last Saturday said the inspector, when he came, would have the keys.’
‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘No one told me.’
I bet my non-friends, the bailiffs, didn’t bother to tell anyone. They probably tossed the keys into the river Cam.
‘What do you suggest we do?’ asked Mr Ward.
‘Do you have a crowbar?’ I asked.
‘No, but I have a tyre lever in the car.’
It took several attempts but the clasp finally parted from the doorframe with a splintering crack. No doubt it would be me that would have to pay for the damage as well as for the keyless lock.
The inspection was very thorough with James Ward literally looking into every nook and cranny. He ran his fingers along the top of the extractor hoods, looked for residue in the industrial dishwasher drains, and even poked a Q-tip swab into the tiny gap between the built-in fryer and the worktop. It was clean. I knew it was clean. I left that gap there on purpose specifically for health inspectors to find and test. I had it cleaned out every day, in case there was an unannounced visit.
‘Fine,’ he said at length. ‘Nice and clean all round. Of course, I will have these swabs tested tomorrow for bacteria.’ He indicated the swabs he had placed in small plastic bags not just from the gap by the fryer, but also those wiped on the worktops, the chopping boards, the sinks and anywhere else he thought appropriate.
‘But is the kitchen now open?’ I asked.
‘Oh yes,’ he said. ‘I spoke with Angela Milne and she was happy that you be reopened as long as I was happy with the kitchen, and I am, provided I don’t get any surprises from these.’ He held up the swabs. ‘And I don’t think there will be. I’ve inspected lots of kitchens and this is one of the cleanest I’ve seen.’
I was glad. I had always been insistent on having a clean kitchen, and not just to pass inspections. There was a note printed on every menu that invited my clients to visit the kitchen if they so wished. Many did. All my regulars had been in there at some time or another and one particular individual always made a point of taking his guests in to see me or Carl, and Gary. I had toyed