at him, tried to pull out of his mind, turning her face away from him, but he stayed firmly merged, his blood pounding through his veins. This was emotion at its worst. He rode the wave out with her, striving to find a way to help her, searching for calm. For centuries, his world had been unemotional, and now, when he needed it most, he couldn't find the balance that was so necessary to aid her.
She went white, so pale her skin was nearly gray. The bluish tinge to her lips had his heart pounding in alarm, but his hands were gentle as he wiped her face and throat.
She caught his arm. "Stay with me."
"I am not going anywhere."
"You can't possibly become vampire, can you, Vikirnoff?"
He knew her fears were because of her twin brother. She had lost him. The last person in her life to really love her. Now, she feared losing Vikirnoff. He brought her hand to his mouth, kissed her knuckles, opened her clenched fist and pressed a second kiss to the center of her palm. "Thanks to you, no. Not ever."
She attempted a smile, trying to tease him, wanting to reassure him. "Then you owe me big time. Big time. And I intend to collect." It was starting again, the torch in her stomach, burning through her lungs and heart and every organ. She tried to breathe through the pain, was desperate for air, for a way to stop the agony just for a moment so she could regroup. Tears burned in her eyes and streaks of blood ran down her face. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her fingers tightening around his. "I'm going to be sick."
"That is good." He swallowed the bile in his own throat, feeling desperate. He wanted to wrap his body around hers, find a way to protect her, to take away every second of the pain. "That is a good thing. It will help you rid your body of toxins."
She tried to crawl away, wanting to get into the shadows, but she was too sick, her body shuddering with pain, collapsing before she could reach the darker edges of the cavern. Vikirnoff tried to touch her, to help her, but she shook her head, pushing his hands away, unable to bear being touched with her skin so sensitive. He waved his hands at the candles flickering closest to her and the lights went out, leaving her with a semblance of privacy as she was sick over and over.
"This sucks," she announced, rolling over to lie still, conserving her strength for the next round. "I know you can make that go away"-she pointed to the mess she'd made-"and I really detest throwing up, so remove it please." She took the water bottle he handed her and rinsed her mouth, grateful he was thoughtful.
Vikirnoff complied, making certain all evidence that she had been ill was removed. "I want to try to do this together, Natalya. Do not hold yourself away from me or try to protect me. You are my life and I need to do whatever I can to help you through this. Let my heartbeat lead yours. Let my breath be yours." He couldn't be a bystander while she suffered so much. He had to find a way to help her.
Natalya reached out her hand for his. It was almost comical to see him so shaken. Her big bad Carpathian. He was actually trembling. Worse, he looked ready to kill something, or someone. Who knew he would react like that? "What are you going to do if I ever have a baby?"
His face paled visibly and his eyes darkened even more. "I cannot think about it now. Not for a long time. Centuries maybe. Perhaps never, if it is anything like this."
The next wave began building and she shifted her gaze to his face, her expression desperate. He brushed back her hair, noting the stripes once again stood out against her skin and hair in bands of orange and black and white. She alternated between the stripes and her pale, almost gray complexion. "Hang on, love, breathe with me. A long slow breath and
ride above the pain."
Her gaze clung to his, her grip on him so tight he thought she might crush his bones, but she followed his breathing, long slow breaths, moving air in and out of their lungs, staying above the worst of the pain. Her body shook and the pinpoints of blood seeping through pores alarmed them both, but