to straighten the picture. Anal-retentive bastard. Even though I knew he didn't do it on purpose, I wanted to beat him up—both for touching my mate and for monopolizing his attention.
I didn't want to beat him like I normally would, either. No, I wanted to pound his stupid nose into his stupid face. I knew it was stupid mating urges but whatever. I'd still kick his ass right here and now if the O'Malley family wasn't in crisis.
Vas was totally unaware of how his actions were pissing me off. Or he seemed to be, anyway. My eyes narrowed when he patted Rory on the shoulder. "I think it's a great idea. You never know what kind of clues we might sniff out."
I snorted. "You think so? I don't know, sometimes scents can be hidden no matter how hard you sniff. Kind of pointless to hide it though, don’t you think? Scents are like farts—once they're out there, the damage is done. It's not like you can suck it back in and shove a plug over it."
Shit. Did I seriously just say all that out loud? I really needed to get this jealousy under control before I blew any chance I had with winning Rory over.
Vas looked at me like I was insane. "What are you rambling about over there? If you ask me, it sounds like you've been sniffing glue. It was a metaphor, little brother. Or an idiom. I don't know, I can never keep them straight. But sniffing out a clue has nothing to do with smelling anything."
Rory's cheeks were bright red as he tried to ignore us, leaning forward to examine the photo as if he were seeing it for the first time. Patrick was oblivious to the whole thing but still jumped right onto the whole metaphor and idiom train. "Sucking farts back in. Funny, but if you're talking about pretending something didn't happen then I think you need to go with something classic like closing the barn doors after the horses got out."
I nodded and decided to tease Rory a little. Not just because I wanted to get any kind of reaction from him I could. He also looked adorable when he blushed. "Classic is good, I like it. How about this one. It's like closing the bottle after you've already poured a shot of Jameson."
Patrick screwed up his face, looking at me like I'd grown a second head. "Who puts the cap on the whiskey bottle after only one shot?"
"Good point." Smirking, I leaned closer to Patrick. "Try this one instead. Blocking a scent once it's been smelled is like pouring a full glass of whiskey back into the bottle."
Patrick gasped in horror. "Shut your mouth. Who would do something so atrocious? Just try and touch my glass after it's been filled, fucker. Do it and you'll lose a hand. Believe that."
The O'Malleys started elbowing each other and coming up with their own suggestions, but Liam, the younger one who’d helped us with our moose problem recently, nipped everything in the bud by putting two fingers to his mouth for an ear-piercing whistle. "Sorry to stop your fun, boys. But I think I just found our clue."
Rory perked up with a relieved look on his face. I felt like a turd for making him uncomfortable, even if he had started it by taking stupid scent blockers. "Show me, Liam. What do you see?"
"It's the plant under his head. See how it's spreading over the ground? That's the Chamaesyce polygonifolia—or as it’s more commonly known, the Seaside Spurge." Liam looked excited as he warmed up to his favorite subject.
Patrick held a hand over his head, waving it in the air like a grade school kid who was trying to get the teacher's attention. "I'm sorry to interrupt. But, did you seriously just say that Da is lying in something called Seaside Spooge? That's either unfortunate or funny as hell, depending on how Da is when we find him."
Liam rolled his eyes, wrinkling his nose with distaste. "I said spurge and you know it. Now hush and let the grown-ups talk, perv. This is serious."
Rory tapped the photo. "Ignore Pattywhack, Liam. You were saying?"
"Huh? Oh, sorry. I was about to bore you with the details about the individual, oblong-shaped leaves that are wider on the bottom and the pale red, hairless stems. But that would probably just get our brothers cracking more jokes anyway. I'll be happy to give you all the botanical information later if