simply talking with the wrong man can ruin her forever. You would not want that, I’m sure.”
“Of course not,” I said nervously. Uncle Miguel’s eyes hung upon every change in my face.
“I shall be direct with you, Benjamin. I notice that you have developed a certain fondness for Miriam. I have not inquired of the matter with her, but I believe she may have it within her to feel the same. You know that she has other suitors, but I do not believe she cares for any of them, and as I say, I wish for her happiness. But I am not such a fool as to send her off in a love match with a man who cannot do her justice.”
“I see.” I nodded, wishing nothing so much as that this conversation had never happened.
“It would be inappropriate to consider you as a suitor in your current state, but there are always options. You may know that I still have need of an agent in the Levant, and since Aaron’s death, I have not found a suitable substitute. You would have to travel a great deal, but there are many opportunities to earn a substantial fortune for both yourself and your family. And, as I’m sure you know, Miriam has one hundred a year settled on her, which should provide an initial level of comfort in establishing a household.”
“Miriam has a hundred a year?” I nearly blurted out. While it might be difficult to maintain a luxurious household upon such an amount, for a woman who had no concerns of food or rent, it was an enormous sum. I could not think why Miriam had needed to borrow money, nor why she had tried to deny that she ever made the request. “Does she receive this money now?” I asked.
“Of course. She receives quarterly payments. She received the last one only a few weeks ago. Why do you ask?”
Why did I ask, indeed. “Your offer is very generous, Uncle.” I took another drink of my wine and pushed myself to my feet, feeling the ache as I did so. “I do not wish you to think me insensible to what you propose. But I know that I am not the right man to be your Turkey merchant. And though the prize you offer is an estimable one, it shall do me little good if I am so far away.”
My uncle stood as well, and placed a hand gently upon my shoulder. “I am perhaps not the most observant man, Benjamin, but I do notice some things. Miriam chose not to travel with Aaron for certain reasons. I am not sure she would feel the same way about you. In any case, I hope you will consider what I offer you. It stands whether you marry or no. I should very much like to see you within the family trade.”
I bowed at my uncle, even as I condemned myself for the formal politeness I offered in return for his generous warmth. But I had no wish to live and trade amongst a pack of turbaned Turks, and I had less of a desire to slip so easily into the role of my dead cousin.
THE NEXT DAY I awoke to find myself stiff from the beating I had taken of Wild’s men, and the area around my right eye was purple and swollen. My uncle had already left for the warehouse by the time I came downstairs, so I sat at the breakfast table with the two ladies of the house. My aunt inquired if I had taken to fighting in the ring again. Miriam stared at me with a kind of horror.
After breakfast I followed Miriam to the parlor, where she had begun leafing through the newspapers. I could not but feel that there was a coolness in her demeanor, and I suppose there was in mine. I knew that I had no right to resent her for having a lover, but I resented her all the same. I think I wanted her to behave somehow to make my resentment disappear or to make it grow. I knew only that I cared for her and that her intrigue with a man I knew to be a rascal tormented me.
“You are to be part of the family in earnest now,” she said to me.
“My uncle has graciously permitted me to stay here during a difficult period.”
She turned a page. “He is a generous man, then.”
I stared at her. “Have I somehow