as he sucks me gently, his tongue circling my clit and building the fire within me to a degree that has me biting down a yelp.
“You okay there?” he asks, lifting his eyes to meet mine. He is between my legs, teasing me deliciously, and I can hardly breathe.
“I’m okay… it just feels so good.”
“I want to make you feel fucking great.” He begins to suck me harder, his tongue flicking faster, faster, faster until my hands hold his head, urging him not to stop.
I’m so close, so ready… oh God. He kisses me over and over and over again, up and down until there is nothing left to do but moan as the release runs through me.
“Oh Conley, oh… oh…” My words are lost as I catch my breath. Conley pulls me back into the pool, and I wrap my arms around him, burrowing my face in his chest. “Thank you.”
He chuckles. “You are so fucking sexy,” he growls in my ear, sending a jolt of pleasure up my spine.
“You’re pretty sexy yourself,” I say, fighting a smile. Part of me is scared to give my body over completely. I feel myself holding back. He must notice.
“What is it?”
I dip my chin, pressing my hands to his solid chest, wanting to reach down and touch him, all of him. But I can’t give myself over that freely. I did that once and I won’t ever do it again.
“It’s been fourteen years,” I say bluntly. “I’ve had sex once in my life — and I got pregnant. My ex is… well… a piece of work. And to be honest…” I dip my forehead to his chest. “I’m totally killing the mood, aren’t I? See… I don’t know how to do this. How to be—”
“Stop, Calico. You are perfect just as you are. And if we’re talking about long stretches of being celibate, I’ve got you beat.”
My mouth falls open. “Really? You?”
He chuckles, sliding his hands down my back, caressing me. “Really. I’ve never even been married.”
“But your son?”
Conley lifts his head to the sky. “Killian’s mom sounds a bit like your ex. She wasn’t interested in sticking around. But we tried to make it work. She died in a car crash when he was still in diapers.”
“Oh, God, Conley. That’s awful.”
“It was a long time ago. Time heals all wounds, that’s what they say, right?”
“You raised him all on your own?”
He swallows something. “Not entirely. I have the motorcycle club, the Heartlands, on my side. They are my family.”
I stiffen. “The Heartlands?”
“You heard of us?”
“I think so…” I say slowly. Not admitting the whole truth — that my ex, Grill, is a member of the Outlaws — their rivals. And once I heard that Grill was instated as club president, I made a plan to leave. I hated his part in that gang for years — they are rapists and thugs, and I know that all too well. It’s why I cut all ties with the man, insisted on having full custody of River. But if I tell all that to Conley, he will never look at me the same way.
“And what have you heard?” he asks.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say, realizing that no matter how good Conley makes me feel, he is still a member of a motorcycle club. And I want nothing to do with a man like that. “This was a mistake.”
He is still holding me. “You don’t mean that.”
Tears begin to pool in my eyes. “I do. I can’t… I’m sorry, Conley. But I have to go.”
I push away from him, climbing out of the pool. Not caring if my thighs jiggle or my belly rolls — only caring about leaving and not looking back. Because I don’t trust myself not to fall for him. So I put my clothes back on quickly, hating that this all turned so fast. But knowing that I’m doing the right thing, even if it hurts.
“It doesn’t have to be like this,” Conley is saying, getting out of the pool and following me.
Dressed, room key in my hand, I’m already walking away. “But it does, Conley. It does.”
Chapter 5
Conley
She walks away, telling me not to follow. I may want her something fierce, but I understand she has put up a wall she isn’t ready for me to break down.
But God, how I want to.
I watch as she returns to her room, and then I perch on my bike for the rest of the night, keeping watch.
Maybe it’s crazy to sit