her hand. “I’m here, Raven. There’s nothing you could say to make me hate you.”
A not-so-tiny part of her desperately wanted to believe that was true.
She drew a deep inhale and took the leap. “That morning, I woke up with a fever, and my throat was on fire. There were these lumps on both sides of my neck as big as gumballs. It hurt so bad, I could barely speak. When my mom realized I was sick, I thought she’d hold me and make it better like she usually did, but her forehead got all crinkly, and her mouth turned hard instead. She was so angry. I was scared and confused because I couldn’t think of what I’d done to make her so mad.
“After she put my sisters on the bus, we went to the doctor, and he said I had strep throat. Instead of coming home after we got my medicine, my mom said we were going on a trip to visit my aunt.
“We drove for hours. I was hungry, in pain, and probably really whiny. We stopped at a diner for lunch, and she ordered my favorite, grilled cheese, because it was soft. But it scratched my throat even worse, so I begged for some ice cream for dessert. She didn’t want me to get it because we needed to get back on the road. But my throat was blazing, so I poured it on extra thick, bawling with tears streaming down my cheeks until she caved and got me a sundae. I was so happy. That cold ice cream felt so good against my throat.
“After we finished, we got back on the road, but a short while later, we got stuck behind a huge accident. There were fire trucks, ambulances, police cars, and two helicopters. We were stuck there forever. My mom was so stressed out. She kept saying that if I hadn’t insisted on that damn sundae, we’d have missed the accident.
“When the road finally opened, it was raining, near dark, and we were already late to my aunt’s house. She kept trying to call her sister, but the phones weren’t great back then, and the service was spotty, so the calls wouldn’t go through, which only made my mother more stressed.
“By the time we got off the highway, it was pitch black, and the rain had picked up. She was snapping at everything. The other drivers who kept their high beams on, my father for not changing out her windshield wipers, the lack of streetlights. And she kept on about the sundae . . . and me.” Raven shuddered as her mother’s words echoed through her mind.
“You okay?” Jack asked.
Raven nodded. “Y-yeah.”
“What did she say?” he asked with trepidation.
Memories crashed over her, causing her throat to constrict. “That I was a selfish brat who only cared about myself.”
Jack stroked her arm. “Oh, Raven,” he said softly.
But Raven wasn’t finished. “She was so angry that I’d thrown that fit in the diner, and it caused her to have to drive in the dark and rain. She said, ‘It would be a miracle if that little stunt doesn’t get us both killed.’”
Jack’s face froze. “Oh, God. No.”
She drew a shuddering breath. “Not a minute later, the car skidded off the road and rolled down a hill into a stream filled with rocks. Turns out, my little stunt didn’t kill us both, just her. And as I waited for someone to find us and free me from my seat belt, I stared out the window at a covered bridge, listening to her last words echo in my mind.” Jack stared at her, his jaw agape. “That’s the most horrifying thing I’ve ever heard.”
“I knew you’d think I'm a monster.” Raven dropped her head in her hands and burst into tears.
“No.” Jack enveloped her in his arms and held her tight. “I’m horrified she said those things and that you believed them. Raven, none of that is your fault.”
“Of course, it is.” She wept against his bare chest.
“You were a child. It’s perfectly normal to want ice cream, sore throat or not.”
“If we’d left when she wanted, we would have missed the accident. She’d be alive today.”
He pulled back just enough to look into her eyes. “Maybe. Or you’d have gotten stuck behind a different one. Or been involved in one somewhere else. You have no idea what would’ve happened.”
She shook her head. “You weren’t in that car that night. She crashed because she was yelling at me.” A