him that although he needed to fill out and should smile more, he, too, was eye-catching. She chose something safer. ‘I’ll bet Josie’s into sports.’
‘She’s into unicorns and princesses,’ he corrected drily. ‘But that’s fine. I’m not a pushy dad.’
‘But she’s a daddy’s girl?’ Hannah hazarded.
There was water on the table and he poured them each a glass. ‘Maybe. We were both determined that she should stay with me when Loren and I split.’ He hesitated. ‘Josie now has a little sister, Maria, born after the split. Loren suffered severe postnatal depression after both her pregnancies. Josie feels secure with me. I can afford a nanny and my younger cousin Emelie is at uni in London so she lives with us and helps out too. Between us, we give Josie a good, loving home.’
‘That’s wonderful,’ Hannah answered. ‘Don’t you have a new partner?’ Then she flushed in case it sounded like she was making a play.
‘No. Life’s hard enough,’ he joked. Then, sobering: ‘Neither has Loren. I suppose that’s partly why she hasn’t completely accepted the divorce. Although …’ He tailed off, fidgeting. He took a breath. ‘I’m going to tell you because hiding things is a bad habit and not unassociated with eating problems. Loren got pregnant with Maria by another man while we were married. I couldn’t take that. I admitted love was gone and the time had come to end things. I was full of doubts but I had to accept she was no longer the person I’d been crazy about. I had to make myself hurt her. The actual ending was difficult in a thousand ways. We had a child. Loren was accustomed to me making her happy and wasn’t convinced I couldn’t … adapt. If I’d offered the option of continuing together and me accepting Maria as my own, she’d have taken it.’
Shock rippled through Hannah. ‘That must have been tough,’ she said sympathetically.
He slid lower in his chair as if the burden of the memories was weighing on him. ‘She was drinking a lot so she probably didn’t even mean it to happen. She wasn’t sleeping with me so there was no question that Maria was mine.’ Their food arrived courtesy of the waiter in the green waistcoat who whirled away with a genial, ‘Varsågoda, hoppas det smakar!’ Here you are. Hope it tastes good. Nico thanked him but stared at his fish and seafood as if not seeing it.
Hannah picked up her cutlery. ‘How has Josie coped?’ Her first bite of beef smeared with fragrant dill sauce was perfection.
Just when she thought he wasn’t going to eat he picked up a fork. ‘Surprisingly well. It helps that Josie adores Maria, who’s two. Whenever Josie comes home from Loren’s she has new photos or videos of Maria to show me.’ He pushed his food around and then took a small mouthful of salmon.
Hannah gave him time to eat some more before continuing the conversation. ‘Do you mind?’
‘Seeing photos of Maria? Of course not – she’s my daughter’s sister. None of the mess our relationship became was their fault, poor kids. Maria calls me “Mydad” because Josie says, “I’m going home with my dad now” and Maria thinks it’s my name. Mydad. Kinda poignant because I’m not. Loren tried to get Maria to call me Nico but she soon reverted to Mydad. She’s a little cutie.’ He took a sip of wine, his strong throat moving. ‘It was Josie’s eighth birthday last month and Maria was the first person on her party list. Loren came too. We’re very civilised.’ There was a trace of regret in the final sentence. Hannah suspected there was a lot going on under his controlled exterior.
He changed the subject. ‘How do you like living in Sweden? I remember the hilarious results of trying to teach you and Rob Swedish when we were kids, yet here you are speaking it.’ He rearranged his food again then ate a prawn.
‘It’s proved more useful than the French I used to sigh over,’ she agreed lightly, surprised he retained such a clear memory of her. Somehow, her having easy recall of him was more understandable. Everyone had known Nico Pettersson, the athletic foreigner. Girls had befriended Hannah to get information about him because he’d been so tight with Rob. ‘How’s your dad?’ she asked. ‘Do you remember him telling people they could call him “Lasse” and them pronouncing it “Lassie”?’
He laughed. He’d eaten nearly half his meal now and was looking more comfortable. ‘People