"But I'll take special care in making you beg for me to fuck you. Now get the hell over here."
She shook her head furiously, and I attempted to grab her. The girl slipped between my fingers, taking off down the hallway while I chased her. She had nowhere to go. I caught her on the balcony, her fingers gripping the fence.
"Let go of me!" she demanded. "Let go of me or I jump!"
She put one of her high-heeled legs on the fence and I took a step back, holding my hands up. "Calm down, Kitty. Don't do anything stupid."
She broke down then, sobs racking her sweet little body until she was a mess of runny makeup and disheveled hair. I tried to approach her, but she hissed at me every time I came near.
"Kitty," I spoke up again, trying to remain calm. "I'm going back inside. Come with me. Let me make it better."
I took a step back inside the penthouse, holding out a hand for her. Several excruciating seconds passed before she finally reached forward, intertwining her fingers with mine. I pulled her against me, breathing a sigh of relief when her body crashed against mine.
Moments later, I guided her back into the room, whispering sweet nothings into her ear to calm her down. She was shaking. My own guilt was eating me up, and I fucking hated it. Not because of Amicia, but because no one before her had made me feel angry at myself like this.
I was a man of business. Whether that business was shady or not was something my conscience had to work out. I'd never given a shit about the opinions of others. But not with Amicia. With her, I wanted approval. And I knew I would never have it again—at least not from her, the one who mattered most.
I guided her into the bedroom, not the guest one where she'd slept on the first night, and not the playroom's bed, but the master bedroom where none of my female friends had ever slept before her. I removed her clothes carefully while she sobbed. I understood then that finding out what she did had broken her. I knew there'd be no going back from what she'd just discovered. She'd never forgive me.
All we had was this one last night.
And I was going to make it one to remember.
I held Amicia's trembling body in my arms that night, whispering how much she meant to me in her ear. I'd never done that for a woman, not even another human being. She made me human again. She turned the monster I'd been for the past few decades into someone with a heart.
I knew she wanted to leave. Her body was there, but her mind didn't want to be with me.
"Stay with me," I said to her. "One last night. Tomorrow you can leave. Just let me have one last night."
She didn't respond, her body rigid in my arms. I wanted her to reassure me, but I knew she wouldn't. I'd fucked up. She knew what I was now. There was no going back from this.
We lay there for hours. I kept whispering in her ear and she moved further and further away from me in the bed.
"I loved you," she whispered in the middle of the night. "And you broke me."
I could have told her I loved her too, but I was too ashamed.
So, I just listened to the sound of her sweet sobbing until sleep pulled us both under.
***
I woke up to sunshine streaming in through the window, with snowflakes dancing in the icy day. My first thought was of her, my sweet Kitty, and my arms sought her out in the bed next to me, coming up empty. She wasn't there. I should have known then she was gone, but I pretended she'd just gone to the bathroom.
I pulled myself out of bed and checked the rooms one by one. She wasn't in the secret room. Not in any of the bathrooms or the other bedrooms. She wasn't in the kitchen, the study, or the living room. The Christmas tree stood there, a silent reminder of Christmas Day—the day she was finally supposed to become mine, and the one I'd forever remember as the first one without her.
Nearing the tree, I took in gift after gift, wrapped up all pretty and waiting for Amicia to tear into the wrapping paper. Except that would never happen now. I'd given her the opportunity to leave, and