Changed by Fire (Phoenix Rising #6) - Harper Wylde Page 0,96
stop him in his tracks.”
Joshua groaned. “Well, then I guess I better figure out a way to make that power work.” His blond hair stuck up in spikes when he dug his hands through it. “I’ve never been able to access it reliably, and even when I had Nix’s blood in me, it came and went as the blood did.”
Ciarán didn’t bother knocking as he ushered Zenoah into the room and my eyes widened in shock. She had been pretty once, and now she was basically a walking corpse.
“Ryder?” I whispered, not wanting to offend her.
Zenoah turned a shattered smile on me. “It’s okay,” she assured me. “There’s nothing he can do about this.” She indicated her body with a wave. “Magical starvation is basically the human version of starvation mixed with cancer. It’s a bit of a destructive process.”
I swallowed hard, my hands clenching tightly into fists. As much as I didn’t like the female, I still didn’t want to let her die, especially in such a painful way. “Killian said you wanted to help us?” My voice was gentle, far gentler than I had expected it to be when confronted with the woman who had spent years eating my mate’s dreams.
“As much as I can,” Zenoah told me with a sigh. “Gaspard has some knowledge of things, of course, but there are secrets they would have hid, even from him. Especially secrets regarding their weaknesses.”
“So you want to help us take down the Council?” Hiro inquired carefully, his eyes studying her intently behind the dark frames of his glasses.
“Absolutely.” The word was fervent, and color stained her ashen cheeks as she nodded. “I want my death to mean what my life didn’t.” She hesitated, her gaze turning to me. “I told them before that I’ll restore your memories of the island if you want me to. I don’t know if it’s good for you or not, but I’ll do it. I can tell you a little of what happened there, but I can’t tell you everything you experienced.”
I took a deep, calming breath, picking my words carefully. “I’m not sure if that’s what I want. I thought so at first, but now…” With everything going on, with everything we needed to do, did I really have the time to experience that trauma all over again? Process it and make sure it didn’t trigger me at an inconvenient time? I wasn’t sure of that.
“It’s not just the island,” Zenoah whispered, her eyes intent on mine, the shadows in her cheeks standing out sharply on her face. “I’ll talk to whichever of you wants to know my knowledge of the Council. I don’t care if Gaspard fries my mind. But there’s something I want to offer you, Nix. Something I won’t have the strength for soon.”
Nerves raced through me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look away. I had to know what she was offering as desperately as I needed to draw my next breath.
“I can rid you of the burden of your past. Your father. Your pain. Everything that’s ever been done to hurt you. I can remove it all,” Zenoah told me, her voice soft as her eyes met mine.
Twenty-Two
Nix
“I can remove all of the painful memories,” Zenoah proposed again, her eyes on mine. Everyone around me gasped at the implication, though she didn’t look away. “A boon, if you will, for what you’ve done for everyone else. For what I did for so long to your mate. I offer it freely. It will be as if none of those things happened. Scrubbed away. Replaced.” A small smile curved her lips. “The choice is yours, Nix. I’ll return the island to you if that’s what you wish, but I want to offer more while I can.” She shifted, meeting my mates’ eyes for a moment. Her gaze lingered a second longer on Killian before she dropped her head. “Find me when you decide,” she told me, before striding from the room.
“She’d take it all?” I whispered, shock still reverberating through me. Michael. Scott. Every horrible moment I’d endured would be gone.
“She’d replace it,” Joshua explained softly, stroking a gentle hand down my back. “It’s what she did to those we brought into the Lodge. She’ll remove the past so you won’t grieve.” Worry flashed for the briefest of moments in his eyes as he added, “Usually it’s done to children, however, since their minds are still forming and there aren’t as many memories to fight against.”