crown. "Take it all."
I part my lips a touch but his impatience takes control and in one quick and lust filled movement he's pushing my head down, forcing his cock down my throat. My eyes water with the sheer girth of it but I don't stop. I grab hold of it again and pump it until I finally feel his body tense before the first burst of hot, thick release hits the back of my throat.
"I want to know about the chef."
I look over to where he's standing by the foot of the bed. He's fully dressed now. I'd showered after he came in my mouth and on my face. He'd wanted to taste me again but I needed a chance to breathe. I'd felt overwhelmed by the depth of our intimacy and the shower gave me the brief reprieve that I needed.
"What chef?" I brush past him to pull a pair of panties from the drawer I'd put them in when I unpacked. I choose a black lace pair and pull them on while he stares at me.
"I heard you talking to Clive about a guy one day when I came to your office. You said he was gorgeous and that he's a chef." His eyes slide over my bare breasts before they settle on my face. "Is he the guy you were going to have dinner with? Did that happen?"
The conversation feels foreign to me given the fact that we'd just spent the day sharing ourselves with each other. "Why are you talking about this now?"
He rubs his hand over his chin. "We should talk about what we expect from each other when we get back to New York."
No. We shouldn't talk about that because I don't want to hear him tell me that he's going to fuck other women when I can still taste his desire on my lips.
"Now?" I spit back as I pull a black t-shirt over my head. "Why now?"
His feet shuffle over the floor as he scrubs his hand over the back of his neck. "Things are different now. Everything is different between us now."
"I'm not seeing anyone. I don't have any plans to see anyone."
"What about the chef?"
"I've never met him. I don't know anything about him," I half-lie. I had done a quick Google search of his name when Ivy first told me about him. He's handsome, in an unkempt, dark haired, tattooed and sexy as all hell kind of way. He's making big waves in the culinary world and he's dating up a storm.
From the images I saw online of him coming out of virtually every hot club in New York the past few months, a quick fuck is all that's on his menu. It would definitely be a fun experience but the emotional fall out from that isn't something I have time for. Tyler Monroe may have been someone I'd want to hook up with a few months ago, but my feelings are so jumbled around Caleb now, that I can't see past that.
"Caleb." I rest both of my hands against his chest. "I'm not going to go on a date with him. I'm not planning on dating anyone after what happened between us."
"I don’t… I'm not sure…Bell...,” he stammers as his eyes search my face. "I'm not sure we should only… I didn't think about us just seeing each other."
I close my eyes willing him to shut his goddamn mouth. "Stop. Just don't say it."
"I think we should talk about it now. It's important."
"Are you going to see other women when we get back to New York?"
"I don't know. I don't know what I'm going to do."
I won't cry. I'm not going to let him break me apart. "Do you regret what we did?"
"No." He grabs hold of my biceps, shaking me slightly. "I wanted that. I still want that. I want that and I want you to be my friend."
"I don't understand," I say because there's nothing else. "We can be lovers and friends. You know that we can be both, right?"
"I can't stand the thought of us hurting each other. I don't want that to happen and if we keep fucking each other we will. It will kill me inside if I break your heart." His hands drop to his sides before he turns and walks out of the room.
It's all I need to hear. My life changing long weekend in the Hamptons just came to a screeching, painful halt.
Chapter 39
I told you so.
It's one of