the subject. There was so much about her and her life that was hard and terrible, but Varon had seemed sure, and now Mave needed the truth. “What should I expect?”
“A journey that will do its best to kill you. It’s winter, but even if it wasn’t, you would still freeze. As you go up, the storm grows worse. It’s constant snow, year-round. There’s nothing alive, so you’ll need to ration. Forget taking water. It will freeze. That’s really all I can say.”
Mave nodded. “Is that all?”
“That’s all,” Invia said softly. “Good luck to you. I’ll come for you when it’s time. You have free roam of the temple.”
Mave left, heart racing as she realized this was happening. No one could stop her now. She only had forty-eight hours to prepare. There was a long list of things she needed to get through. She found her husbands first, asking a priest to point them out. They were settling into a large room together.
“I leave in two days,” she told them. “I’ll spend tonight with you, but tomorrow night, I need to do something before I leave.”
“Come in here then, and stop wasting time,” Mat ordered.
She did as he asked, closing the door behind her. She fell into the bed, and they rolled around, enjoying each other’s bodies as if it would be their last time. Food was left outside the door, and they ate it between those moments.
They went and went until they collapsed, letting Mave have a dreamless sleep.
Kristanya had given her the one warning the goddess was willing to give.
There would be no other.
39
Mave
The next day, Mave got their help with preparing her bag. She would only take one. She planned on taking her weapons because she never left them anywhere. They packed in bags and bags of their jerky for her to eat on the climb. If she rationed, she could do an entire month with what they gave her. Mat added several bags of straight spice he liked to cook with.
“It’ll hurt but warm you. Just throw it in your mouth and eat it,” he explained. “It’s a stupid trick and will only fool your mind, but sometimes, that’s needed.”
“Or throw it on snow. Also, snow…make sure you only eat the freshest snow for water. Anything else could get you sick. Can’t even promise fresh would be better, but it’s the best option,” Zayden rambled.
“I know,” she whispered.
“I hate this,” he said, repeating what he’d been saying the entire trip. “But I know you have to do it.
“What’s your plan for tonight?”
“Emerian,” she answered, looking at the male who asked. Bryn raised his eyebrows. “I need to…say some things to him. Also, Leshaun taught me how to do his tatua, and…that’s mine to do. He’s earned them. He’s…just like you three. Honorable and aggravating.”
“Something changed in him after that mission,” Mat said softly.
“He became one of us.” She was positive, and it scared her. “So, I’m going to do his tatua, then release him from this…quest to protect me. He needs to become his own male. He’s there, right on the edge, and it’s time he’s released from the place he’s been stuck in.”
“He was barely your nemari for two-and-a-half seasons,” Bryn huffed. “Do you really think he’s ready?”
“Yes. And…” She stood up and went to the little glass peephole in their room, which gave them a view to the outside world. The sun was falling. “It’s time for me to deal with this. I’ve been avoiding him for too long, hoping for the right moment. I might die and never have the chance, which makes this…the perfect time. I need to settle my affairs.”
She kissed each of them and walked out. Stopping the first priestess she saw, she asked for two bowls, a large pitcher of water, and a washcloth. Mave had the dagger she needed.
“Also, do you know which room my nemari is in?”
“He’s there,” she said, pointing to the door across from her. “He hasn’t come out since your arrival. I’ll bring those items for you.”
“Thank you,” Mave said softly, nodding respectfully. She turned to Emerian’s door and knocked softly. When the male opened the door, she realized his eye patch was gone. She hadn’t seen it fully healed. He kept it bandaged on the road and wore an eyepatch at all times.
Her stomach twisted.
His pretty face was half-ruined, and it was her fault. One of his stunning ruby eyes was gone, and it was her fault. She didn’t know how she could