get you back from, what you call it, non-extra-whatever. I might go to Azerbaijan,’ he said, pronouncing it with no accuracy whatsoever, but with enough confidence that Ashley briefly wondered if she was the one who had it wrong. ‘Sounds exotic,’ Rick smiled.
Ashley tried to look as though she didn’t think Rick was completely stupid. ‘Rick, I don’t think that’s gonna happen. In fact, if you try to get away, that’s a lot riskier for you.’
Rick gave her a look that said he definitely thought Ashley was completely stupid and he didn’t mind letting her know it. ‘Look, either way, I’m fucked. I die, or I go to prison. So I might as well go for the gold here, you get what I’m saying?’
Ashley had no further case to plead. Because Rick cared about his own life so much that he was willing to risk the lives of strangers to keep it, yet not enough to do the simplest, safest thing and hand himself over. He was a dreadful mix of stupidity, selfishness, bravado, and pig-headedness. Ashley couldn’t begin to counter it.
Her phone rang. She gasped, grabbing it from her pocket. ‘Sorry, sorry.’
‘Who is it?’ Rick snapped. ‘You can switch the camera off now, by the way,’ he said to Gina. The recording light went off, and Gina dropped the camera down by her side. Ashley, meanwhile, had finally gotten the bloody phone out of her pocket to see a work number. ‘It’s the station.’
Rick’s irritation gave way to delight. ‘Answer ‘em! They need to know they’ve got tonight’s big story, don’t they?! Put ‘em on speaker.’
Ashley swallowed a big lump in her throat and took the call she’d been avoiding all afternoon, switching it to speaker. ‘Hello?’
‘Ashley!’ Bernie’s voice exploded from the tinny speaker. ‘Where in the purple fuck have you been? You’re hours late, I’ve had that vicar on the phone tearing me a new arsehole, and we’ve got a gap in tonight’s show!’ screamed Bernie.
‘Bernie, just give me a second, and I’ll explain-’ Ashley began, trying to remain cool.
‘Explain what? I’ve been trying to ring you and Gina all afternoon with no answer. I thought maybe Gina might have come out of left field and been the one to snap and push you off a tall building-’
Ashley gave Gina a quick look. She could have sworn there was the ghost of a smile on her lips. ‘Bernie… I’m in a hostage situation.’
That only made Bernie angrier. ‘Oh, for the love of Christ! I don’t care if you and Gina aren’t getting on, don’t be so bloody hyperbolic as to call it a-’
‘Bernie, please, would you just listen a second?’ Ashley interrupted tiredly. But Bernie was still going, saying something about the vicar threatening to sue him. Ashley wondered if she should just let him rant for a bit, tire himself out. She could have another go when he was hoarse.
But then Rick snatched the phone out of her hand. Ashley was sort of relieved. ‘Hello? Is this Ashley’s boss?’ Rick asked.
Bernie paused. ‘Yeah. Who’s this?’
‘I’m the gunman. From the hostage situation. She wasn’t kidding. Got her and the camerawoman with me now, at Jimmy’s pizza.’
‘Jimmy’s… What?’ Bernie said, his rage pivoting to bewilderment.
‘Fuck me, you don’t listen, do you? Typical fucking boss. She’s in a HOST-AGE SIT-U-AT-ION, mate,’ he said slowly, rolling his eyes at Ashley.
Bernie went quiet. ‘Could you put her back on?’
Rick nodded his permission at Ashley, but he kept hold of the phone, holding it out for her to speak. ‘Bernie?’
‘This isn’t a joke, is it? Because you know I’ve got absolutely no sense of humour about work.’
‘It’s real,’ Ashley told him.
‘Are… are you OK?’ Bernie asked.
‘Yes, I’m alright,’ Ashley said with all the reassuring calm she could generate under the circumstances.
‘And Gina?’
‘I’m OK, too,’ Gina answered.
‘Should I call the police?’ Bernie asked.
‘They’re already here, outside,’ Ashley told him.
‘OK… Err, I don’t actually know what to do,’ Bernie said, panic trembling through his voice.
‘I can help you there,’ Rick interjected. ‘What you’re gonna do is put this on the news tonight. Six o’clock headlines. You got it?’
Bernie paused. ‘Well, I guess I could send someone down now to cover it.’
‘Nah, we’ve got that in hand. Ashley’s doing it,’ Rick explained.
‘Oh,’ Bernie said. And then, ‘Hang about, what?’
Ashley jumped in. ‘I was… I happened upon the story, and I decided to cover it, and then things… took a turn. But we’ve got plenty of footage for you to use. I mean, you’ll be cutting it