Came Back Haunted (Experiment in Terror #10) - Karina Halle Page 0,98

I feel the receptionist’s eyes on me, probably seeing how close I am to shattering.

To be honest, I didn’t even think I’d make it this far. I was so certain yesterday that Samantha was going to come for me with the demon by her side. When Dex held me in the shower, I think that was maybe the lowest point of my entire life, and if it wasn’t for him there, I don’t know what would have happened. Maybe she would have come. Or maybe it would have been worse.

Maybe the danger would have been myself.

After that, I slept. I slept all day and all night, with Dex watching over me the whole time. At least in my dreams I was safe, and while he protected me the best he could, I also know that at some point, his protection won’t matter.

But I’m here now. I’ve made it this far.

Barely.

It’s early afternoon and, even after sleeping so much, I feel exhausted to my marrow. Coffee doesn’t help, nothing helps. I’m held together with unraveling string.

“Have a seat,” Lana says to me softly, as she closes the door.

I gingerly sit down on the couch, wringing my hands together, as if that will help me stay whole.

“Perry,” she says gently. “Look at me.”

I look up from my hands as she takes the seat across from me, leaning in close, her elbows on her knees.

“Something has happened to you,” she says after a moment, her expression strained as she takes me in.

For a horrible moment I think she’s going to tell me that I’m crazy, that I’m beyond her expertise, that I should be committed just like my grandmother was.

Then she holds out her palm in offering.

I stare at it for a moment, then up at her warm face, then gingerly lift my hand and place it in hers.

She grasps it, just tight enough, and I feel a hot current flow from her palm to mine, warming me to the core.

“Let me in,” she says softly, her eyes imploring mine. “Let me in your head, in your thoughts. Let me help you.”

I’m afraid. I’m afraid that she’s going to see everything, even the ugly bits I never tell her. I’m afraid that she’ll see my soul and what I’m made of and find out that I’m not made of much at all.

But with the last ounce of strength that I have, the last thread of hope, I push that fear to the side.

I close my eyes.

And I mentally move back the walls. They’re heavy and they don’t want to move and I have to keep pushing at them, so used to trying to keep people out.

I let her in.

I feel her too, this presence, like the black has lifted just a bit, and a beam of light and warmth has been able to sneak past. It settles inside my head, pushing things around, not unpleasant, but not quite comfortable either.

This goes on for a few minutes, my body tense, wondering when she’ll find what she’s looking for.

Then suddenly it all withdraws.

I open my eyes to see her staring at me with a pained expression, swallowing hard.

“I’m so sorry Perry,” she says to me, squeezing my hand. “No one should have to go through any of that.”

I clear my throat, feeling strangely emotional over that experience. “What did you see?” I ask, noticing her eyes are watering. She’s emotional too, first time I’ve seen her like this.

She pulls her hand out of mine and looks up at the ceiling, delicately running her fingers under her eyes to make sure the tears aren’t falling. “I saw everything.”

“I think you know me better than my husband does now,” I comment.

She gives a slight shake of her head and looks at me, a soft smile curving her lips. “No. He knows you better than you know yourself. That much is true and will never change.”

“But he can’t protect me now,” I tell her. “No one can.”

Lana sighs and sits back in her chair, looking me over. “This isn’t quite true. But we’ll come back to that. First, we have to look at what’s really happening here. Where this all started…the want for a child.”

My heart beats heavily in my chest, feeling waterlogged. “Is it so wrong to want that?”

“No,” she says. “It’s natural. It’s normal. Maybe not for everyone, but for most people I would think.”

“Do you want kids?” I ask.

She waves her left hand at me. “Got to find a man first. But I’m not looking