off the planet, as if their time together had been blotted out.
What was going on? He wanted to know how she was doing, how her mother was doing, even how her grandmother was doing. And he wanted to bask in the relief Ethan’s confession gave them both—her, because it made such a difference to her immediate future, and him, because he no longer had to worry about her being in a terrible situation. Once she received her settlement, she’d be able to support herself until she found another job that she actually liked. And if she couldn’t find anything right away? She could survive until a better opportunity came along. That sex video wouldn’t hold her back forever. It would become old news as soon as someone else—a movie star or other high-profile figure—made headlines with his or her own sex tape. Or divorce. Or affair. Or other scandal.
Emery would soon be in the clear and he would like to have been able to celebrate with her. But there was only this strange, ominous silence.
Had she cut him off? He suspected she had, that she was handling their separation with the same grit and determination he’d seen when they parted at the airport and she wouldn’t even let him kiss her.
But he truly cared about her. Couldn’t they have some kind of relationship? Despite all of his issues, he couldn’t help hoping for that, at least. Having her out of his life completely made him miserable.
He tried to tell himself that he had to let her do what she needed to do. He was the one who’d decided they couldn’t pursue a relationship. And his reasons for it were still true. She’d crashed into his life like a comet—made a huge impact—and now he had to fill the hole.
He tried to do that by taking his brothers bouldering, as he’d promised. They went ice-skating, too, with the students who were still at the school. And they went Christmas shopping. Dallas even wrapped the presents he’d bought—for the first time ever. They were crudely done, but at least he’d put forth the effort.
He was doing everything he could to get into the holiday spirit, but the moment Emery left, Christmas had lost its sparkle.
“It feels strange not to have Emery here,” Liam said as they were making dinner on Christmas Eve. Aiyana and Cal were due to arrive home at any moment, and Dallas had recruited his two youngest brothers to help surprise them by making the family’s traditional Christmas Eve dinner of salmon in parchment pouches with slivered vegetables. “I was sort of getting used to having her makeup in the bathroom.”
“Yeah, toward the end that didn’t bother me anymore, either,” Bentley chimed in. “We’ve never had a sister. I mean we have sisters-in-law, but have never lived with a girl. I really liked her.”
“And I bet she’d be a lot better at this than we are,” Liam said as juice rolled out of the corner of one of the pouches onto his lap, and he had to drop it and jump up to get a rag. “Mom makes it look easy.”
“Mom makes everything look easy,” Bentley agreed.
“What’s Emery up to?” Liam asked as he returned to his station and continued to tie string around the packets Dallas was filling with food. “Is she having a good Christmas in Boston?”
Dallas had ignored the mention of her name, but he couldn’t ignore a direct question. “I’m sure she is,” he muttered because he didn’t want to admit that he didn’t know, but he’d spoken too gruffly and he knew it when Bentley shot him a dirty look.
“Why are you in such a bad mood?”
“I’m not in a bad mood,” Dallas lied. “I’m just concentrating on making this meal. I want it to turn out halfway decent, okay?”
Bentley finished another one of the packets. “You know Mom will be thrilled that we even tried.”
“She’ll be even happier if it’s edible,” he snapped, but when both brothers looked at him in surprise, he realized he’d spoken too harshly again.
“Jeez, Dal,” Liam grumbled.
He bit his tongue so that he wouldn’t make it worse and was relieved when the twins came in and the conversation veered toward getting a game of football together tomorrow and trying to decide what time would least interfere with Aiyana’s plans for Christmas Day.
Once it was settled that they’d head to the field after lunch, and they were finished with the salmon packets, Dallas put them in the oven while