me once again. “Friends?”
I nodded. “Yes. Always.”
His hand came up to his mouth, and he honestly seemed to be struggling with something.
“Talk to me, Aiden. What’s wrong?”
With another shake of his head he walked back up to me. He cupped my face in his hands and stared into my eyes. “I’m sorry, Willa. I wish I could, but I can’t.”
“You wish you could what? Aiden, you’re making no sense right now.”
He drew in a deep breath and then slowly let it out as he rested his forehead against mine. “You’re so beautiful, and one day some lucky bastard is going to marry you, you’ll have babies, and you’ll teach them all about apples.”
I searched his face before placing my hands on his arms.
“I’m sorry that person can’t be me.” He closed his eyes and whispered, “I want it to be me so fucking badly.”
I drew in a breath, but before I could say anything, he pressed his mouth to mine once more. The kiss was so sweet, yet full of an emotion I couldn’t pinpoint. I tried to get closer. If I could have crawled into his body, I would have.
He jerked his mouth from mine, and I fought for air.
“You’ll always have my heart, Aiden. I swear to you, it will always belong to you.”
He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut before he looked down at me. “Don’t wait for me, Willa.”
I lifted my chin, about to tell him I’d wait for eternity, when he kissed me once more and then whispered against my lips, “Friends, always.”
He drew back, wiped the tears away from my cheeks, and then took a step away.
With a shaky voice that didn’t even sound like my own, I replied, “Friends, always.”
Aiden
Two weeks later
“O’Hara, what’s on your mind?”
I turned to look at Master Chief Holden, the leader for my SEAL team, as the sound of the blades swirled around the inside of the chopper. I forced thoughts of Willa out of my head. “All good, sir.”
He gave me a knowing look. “Something is off, and don’t say you’re fine. I can tell when someone on the team isn’t in sync.”
My stomach jerked a little as I thought about kissing Willa. About how I almost told her I loved her. How I almost asked her to be mine. To wait for me, to come to Virginia Beach after she graduated college.
In that moment, I’d wanted to be a selfish bastard, because I knew if I had asked her to be with me that night in the barn, she’d have said yes. I saw it in her eyes. I felt it in her kiss. If I’d asked her to walk away from all of her dreams and come sit in an apartment in Dam Neck, Virginia, and worry every time I got deployed, she would have done it.
But there was no fucking way I could ever allow her to give up her dreams. I cared about her too much to ever ask her to do that. Yet, I had thought of asking. More than once.
“A girl, sir.”
He smiled and shook his head. “It’s always a girl. You went back home, correct?”
I nodded.
“First love from high school?”
With a grin, I shouted over the chopper blades, “Best friend’s little sister who’s all grown up now.”
He laughed. “Damn, son, don’t you know the code? You never go for your best friend’s little sister.” My smile faded some, and he placed his hand on my shoulder. “You together?”
“No,” I replied as I shook my head. “I wanted to ask her, but no.”
“You sleep with her?”
I felt my stomach twist into a knot. “No, sir, but I sure wanted to do that as well.”
He stared at me for a moment. “We’ve all been there, Aiden. Most of us end up always picking the team over the girl. Sad to say it, but it’s true. Some can make it work, some can’t. The only thing I need to know from you is if your head is gonna be on straight when we land and do this op. Will it?”
“Yes, sir. A hundred-and-ten percent, sir,” I replied.
He nodded and squeezed my shoulder. “Let her go, O’Hara. Trust me, she’s better off without you in her life. It’s tough for the women around us to live this type of life.”
I ignored the slight tightening in my chest. “I agree, sir.”
“Best thing for you to do is get her out of your head as quickly as possible. After the op, I suggest alcohol and