This Burns My Heart Page 0,79

so much luggage that some of it rested in the hallway outside her door. For much of the day, Eun-Mee sat there on the floor, wearing a shower cap and a robe, looking for items, smiling at the occasional guest. She unpacked what looked like dozens of coats and dresses, of all colors and for all seasons, arranging them in the room like the limbs of an adored child. But what Soo-Ja noticed most were her shoes, some of which looked imported from Italy.

Ever since she had started saving money for the land, Soo-Ja had stopped buying things for herself; she got used to wearing her shoes until they fell apart. Around Eun-Mee, she could not help trying to hide her feet under her dress. Shoes matter, she remembered her father telling her when she was little. What you stand on is what you are.

Yul stayed in a separate room, and while Soo-Ja found this odd, she thought it best not to comment on it. Soon, Soo-Ja found herself drawn to his end of the hallway almost magnetically, and if she could have seen her thoughts through some kind of magical X-ray, she might have been alarmed by the buzzing lines and ricocheting sparks leading directly to his door.

Yul’s character hadn’t changed much over the years; Soo-Ja had realized this during their check-in, the day before. In front of Eun-Mee, and much to her smiling approval, Yul had signed a guest bill featuring a substantial discount. But when she hadn’t been looking, Yul added 1,000 won to the sum, which was more than Soo-Ja normally charged for the rooms.

Soo-Ja kept the extra money in an envelope and set it aside. She planned on returning it to Yul on the day he checked out. Of course, she couldn’t simply hand it back to him, or he’d refuse; she figured she might need to perform a delicate sleight of hand, using distraction and trickery to slip it into the pocket of his trenchcoat on his way out.

Occasionally, guests called the front desk, and Soo-Ja sent Miss Hong to attend to them. But when she heard a buzz come from room 311, Soo-Ja decided to go herself. She took a deep breath and dried her damp hands by pressing them against the front of her dress. The door to the room had been left ajar, and Soo-Ja came in, her steps tentative. Yul stood with his back to her, and he did not meet her eyes right away. The room, like all the others, had no windows, only wallpaper featuring brown half squares meant to suggest traditional wood lattices. A small straw basket, weighed down by cotton blankets, sat against a corner; it was the only piece of furniture there.

“Did you call for me? Everything all right with the room?” asked Soo-Ja.

“Yes. I like the room very much. I wasn’t sure if I should ask you here or not. It seems a little demeaning to ring a buzzer, but I couldn’t think of another way to be alone with you.”

“Don’t worry. You’re not only a guest, but a friend, too. I want you to enjoy your stay.”

“I’ve been thinking about what I said to you yesterday. I didn’t mean for it to come out quite that way. It’s just that—the last ten years have been difficult, and I don’t want the next ten to be like that.”

Soo-Ja heard the sound of voices vibrating through the walls from the room next door. For a moment, she worried that others might hear them, too, and she found herself walking farther into the room, standing closer to Yul. “Are you ill?”

Yul let out a rueful laugh. “Soo-Ja, there’s nobody listening in. You’re with me now. And I know you.” Yul walked past her, to the door, and closed it, bringing silence into the room. He then returned and stood in front of Soo-Ja. “Do you remember the first time we met? The long ride in the bus? Do you remember when I came to your art class, and we drew those paintings together? Why don’t you talk to me the way you talked to me back then?”

“That might as well have happened to somebody else. It’s not my life now.” Soo-Ja produced a stained dishrag from her pocket, the way a gentleman might produce a silk handkerchief. “Look at this. Can you imagine me scrubbing floors back then? My body seems to have a lower center of gravity now.”

To her surprise, Yul took the rag from