Brutus - Mimi Jean Pamfiloff Page 0,2

doing to me? He was at her mercy. Every ounce of his determination to complete his mission melted away beneath the expert strokes of her rough, strong, but petite little hand.

He clenched his eyes shut and made fists behind his back. I’m going to co—

“Oh, look. You’re all fixed now.” She smiled devilishly and withdrew her hand.

Brutus looked down to see all ten inches of “the General” standing at attention. “Don’t stop. Don’t sto—”

“He’s all yours, Helga.” Fina stood, turned, and disappeared into the jungle with a proud spring in her step. The echo of her laughter faded off in the distance.

He winced, looking up into Helga’s hungry gaze. Jesus, no.

“Well, well, I guess the man cow is ready for another milking.” Helga straddled his lap. “Now get moving and give me pleasure. I will stay here all night if I must.”

Dear gods. He’d better get this over with as quickly as possible. Perhaps they’d allow him one night of sleep. Just one. Then, tomorrow, he could figure out a new plan, including how to persuade Fina to give him an audience with her mother.

CHAPTER TWO

Zac, God of Temptation and the tiredest motherfucker on the planet, stood chained to a boulder in the world’s sparkliest cave, wondering how his existence had led him to this perplexingly bleak moment: Unicorn prisoner.

It seemed the Universe was on a crash course for revenge, repeatedly handing him one clusterfuck of a situation after another. Did the Universe have a bone to pick with him? All men? All incredibly handsome immortal men?

He didn’t know, but being a god, he sensed something in the air. A woman-scorned vibe.

Maybe that’s just the randy evil unicorn trying to give me a blowjob. He glanced down at two fiery eyes bobbing over his groin. Yep. Just two hovering eyes. The rest was invisible.

“Sorry, Minky, but it’s not going to work. You don’t even have a body, and if you did, my heart belongs to Tula. It will always belong to Tula.” Tula was the prim-and-proper assistant at their office, Immortal Matchmakers, Inc., where they were tasked with finding mates for even the most unlovable of immortals. Tula—a human—was unlike any being Zac had ever met, her heart made of pure goodness. So good, in fact, that every effort to tempt her—as was his role since he was the God of Temptation—into his arms had failed horribly. Total disaster. It wasn’t until he opened his heart to Tula for the right reason, love, that she finally gave in. It was the moment he realized she was his mate and the moment when the Universe began doing everything in her power to keep them apart.

Which was how he ended up here. Locked inside Minky’s private lair.

Minky growled out a string of mumbled words.

“Hey, don’t blame me,” he said. “It was your plan to trick me into being your man. And might I remind you, Minky, you were perfectly aware of my affections for Tula at the time. What were you thinking anyway, huh?” He had been trying to bring Tula back from…from…well, he wasn’t exactly sure. Tula had died during a very unfortunate boating incident, and not long after, her ghost began appearing to him and only him. But knowing that her spirit had not moved on from this world had convinced him he could bring her back. All he needed was her body. Her perfectly preserved body.

The problem was that an insane, horny, evil unicorn was in possession of said body. Minky ate it.

Which was how he’d become Minky’s sex pet. Minky had claimed she could reunite Tula’s spirit with her unicorn-preserved physical form. For a price. So, eager to be with the woman he loved, Zac had agreed blindly, unaware of the cost: Minky wanted him for herself. And, as anyone will tell you, a deal struck with a unicorn is unbreakable. Sneaky, dirty fucking unicorn! I will never love you!

Hovering over him, Minky rumbled and released a plume of fire.

“Yeah, well, too bad!” he barked. “I guess neither of us gets what we want, then. Oh, and by the way? You reneged on our deal. You were supposed to help get Tula back in her body, so I don’t feel one little crumb of remorse.”

Minky grumbled something about never specifically saying that she would help with that. She’d merely said she knew who could: Cimil, Goddess of the Underworld. Unfortunately, Cimil had been locked up by some very angry mermen. And by locked up, he meant that Cimil’d