married. I don’t expect an answer right away. Think about it. I want my nephew to have a stable home and my last name and to be taken care of if anything should happen to me. I also don’t want people thinking badly of you because of the circumstances. There’s a lot I can offer you. There’s also not much in the way of my being a husband but I’ll try. I promise to keep you happy and you have my word that I’ll respect, care for and protect you and my nephew until the day that I die.
Nathan.
I drop the ring like it’s burning hot, the note too. My brain forces my body to propel me backwards, my eyes wide as fear and panic race through me.
Why would he ask me this?
I glance down at the ring already on my finger and notice how simple it is in comparison to the ring Nathan has gifted me with. His brother’s ring. The one Caleb put on my finger.
How can he even… why would he… what is wrong with him? He can’t honestly think I’d go for this?
Marriage means a lot of things, sex being one of them. I could never do that. Never.
He can’t honestly want this… can he?
I feel sick.
“Are you ready?” Sasha shouts.
“C… coming!” I call and tuck the note and ring back into the envelope before thrusting it back into the drawer.
This won’t ruin today, I won’t let it. Nathan is just being noble, even though he has a weird way of showing it. It’s not the eighteenth century, or whatever century that shit like this went down. It’s not even necessary in any way shape or form. I don’t care what people think of me. Caleb was the love of my life and they can go fuck themselves if they think I wasn’t his.
He chose me. He died beside me. In my stomach is half of him.
Damn it, Nathan! What are you doing?
Why would he ask me this today of all days? Maybe so I could talk it over with my friends. Screw that. I’m not looking to see their reactions, that’s something I’d rather miss.
I head down the stairs, fanning my face to rid it of the nervous perspiration that seems to be beading on my skin. “Let’s go.” I push open the door, my bag tucked close to my side. “There isn’t much to see in the village but there is a nice clothing store. The women there are amazing at making clothes to fit you perfectly.”
“Wow.” Sasha remarks dryly. “How lucky for you.”
I shrug. “I like it. I like the people and the coffee shop and what few restaurants they have, which yes, are all pub restaurants. They’re cosy. Like something out of a movie.”
“I envy your quiet life.” Sasha again says this dryly.
Tommy opens the car door for me, forcing Sasha to get into the back. I’m grateful because once I got in the back I doubt I’d be able to climb out again. It’s only a three door car. The front seats slide forward for access to the back.
Definitely not going to happen.
Sasha doesn’t seem to mind, though. She leans forward between our seats and messes with the radio. Good luck getting that out here.
She gives up after ten minutes and turns on a CD as I direct Tommy to the village.
We stop at the clothing store first and Sasha cringes at almost everything. It is very… formal I suppose, but it’s warm and comfy.
“EBay, Christ. Ever heard of it? Just because you’re pregnant and living with a bunch of fogies doesn’t mean you have to dress like one,” Sasha whispers. I stifle my laughter and allow the lady to guide me into the back for measurements. She takes them in seconds, her memory clearly better than mine. After pointing at a few different things, I pay at the counter and meet Tommy on the sidewalk outside.
“That was fast,” he comments, ignoring a still grumbling Sasha. “Now what?”
“Welcome to hell.” Sasha looks up at the sky. “How do you not get bored here?”
“Nathan takes me to the city with him sometimes. That’s fun. Jeanine the housekeeper is there every morning, so I get to chat with her for a while. Nathan also got me a laptop and there are loads of books to read and places to explore.” Not including the rat infested grass that I tend to avoid. “He’s suing his parents.” I say this in a hushed tone, mindful