my heartache fresh, I can’t think of a solitary goddamn reason why.
Ruby
I make it all the way into my apartment and into the bathroom before I can’t hold back tears anymore.
My dad is right, the shower curtain is a useless attempt at privacy, a fact that becomes starkly apparent as my apartment door opens and my parents step inside.
They’re quiet, which isn’t a shock given my mental breakdown on the sidewalk, but after a minute or so, my mom’s feet stop just on the other side of the curtain.
“Ruby,” she calls softly, and I have to cover my face to combat the tears that are renewed at the sound of it. “You don’t have to come out, sweetheart. I…I know the last thing you want is your mom and dad hovering over you with what you’re going through.”
My tears fall harder, and I have to force myself to take a breath as my throat locks up.
“I just want you to know we love you. I’ve spent a lot of years worrying about you.” My dad snorts across the room, and my mom giggles a little. “Yeah. I guess you know that.” She pauses briefly, and I grab a piece of toilet paper to wipe my face. “I just want you to know that after what I just saw down there…”
Here it comes.
“I’m not worried at all.”
What?
“You’re a strong woman with a strong sense of self, and I know, without a doubt, you know how to take care of yourself.”
Gah. Mom. I sniffle into my tissue and shake my head. I love you.
“Now, listen. Your dad and I are gonna go. Give you your privacy and your time. But if you need me, you just pick up the phone—”
I’m off my feet and through the curtain before she can finish her sentence.
She closes her arms around me tightly as I shove my face in her neck and lean everything I’m feeling into her.
She strokes my hair and kisses my head, and I know, because of her and my dad, I’ll get over this—over him—and move on to bigger and better things.
“I love you, Mom.”
“Oh, Ruby,” she hums. “I love you too.”
It’s been a week since my life imploded, and despite the short respite I took to see my parents off at the airport, I’ve mostly just been a mess of tears and anger and inability to do anything but wallow.
But, fuck, I’m tired of crying over a guy who most certainly doesn’t deserve my tears.
A guy who most certainly isn’t sitting around crying over me.
Yeah. Exactly. A guy who probably already has dived back into his player ways and found his next big challenge.
It’s harsh reality, but it’s reality.
And today, I’m determined to turn over a new leaf.
After a brief text exchange with my mom this morning, letting her know I’m doing okay and her responses surprisingly devoid of prying or paranoia, I forced myself to take a shower, brush my hair, and get myself presentable enough to go to class.
Property law class, in fact. With my internship credit fully accounted for, this is the only class I still have to attend this semester because, unfortunately for us, Kevin and I both left this class until our third year instead of getting it out of the way early.
Luckily, it’s boring and mundane enough that it just might numb my fucking brain so much it won’t be able to think about anything, namely the man whose name I’m choosing to forget.
“So…what’s going on with you?” Kevin asks as I sink down into a seat beside him.
“Hmm?” I mumble, taking out my computer and getting it set up to take notes.
“You,” Kevin says. “Something is up with you. I know you said you were sick last week, but it’s something else. I can tell.”
I shake my head and purse my lips. “Uh-uh. Nothing’s up.”
“Gemmm…”
“Kevin, I’m fine.”
“Oh, well. Okay, then. No woman in the history of the world has ever said she was fine without actually meaning it before, but sure, you’re fine.”
I turn and glare.
He smirks. “Frankly, I think they should just change the definition of that fucking word altogether. No one is ever fine when they say they are.”
“Kev—”
“What happened with him, Ruby?”
I sigh. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You know what? Perfect. Neither do I.”
I roll my eyes, and he laughs. “What? You think you’re the only one who can say one thing and mean another?”
“Jesus Christ, you’re a pain in my ass.”
“What happened?”
“He didn’t want me, okay?” I finally