Big Ben (See No Evil Trilogy #1) - Nana Malone Page 0,67

an ovary. Hell, that smile could make every ovary in this building explode. “Just for a few days. Until we get you squared away.”

“This feels like I’m taking advantage of your generosity.”

“You’re not. I’m offering.”

“You make it hard to fight you when you’ve already seen me at my lowest.”

“And do I judge?”

I coughed a laugh. “Only a little.”

He spread his arms. “See? Then say yes.”

All I wanted to do was get a decent night’s sleep and not be afraid or worried. “I don’t want to intrude on your space.”

“My loft is one thousand square meters. You’re not intruding.”

Wow. “Oh, okay then. Are you sure?”

He nodded. “Yeah, I’m sure. It’s nothing permanent, obviously, but it gives you a chance to figure out what you want to do.”

“I don’t even know how to say thank you.”

“Just say yes so that we can get back to work.”

“And just when I thought I knew you, you completely change.”

“Yep. I have to keep you guessing, don’t I?”

Ben

You have it bad, you twat.

Saving Olivia from Fenton Mills had been a happy accident. It gave me just the excuse I needed to keep her safe. Without having to tell her everything. Fully disclosing everything about the Elite would only put her in more danger. So I was doing what was best for her.

By lying.

Sometimes lying was necessary. You’re sure about that? Yes. I was bloody sure. And I certainly wasn’t going to argue with myself about it anymore. What was done was done and I wasn’t going to apologize for it. She didn’t need to know anything about the shooting. Or the likelihood that the muggings hadn’t been random.

She’d be scared and worry. And I couldn’t take any more of that blank terrified look she’d given me at the end of the Jack the Ripper tour. So I was going to keep the lid on the real reason her life was imploding. To protect her.

How are you pussywhipped without the pussy?

Christ I was a mess. My bullshit reasoning for not telling her everything notwithstanding, I wanted to be near her. Putting myself in charge of her safety accomplished that.

It’s not like I was any good at pretending I was immune to her anyway. Now that she was in my space, it was only getting worse.

Easy does it, she’s not yours.

The fuck she wasn’t.

Whatever she needed, I wanted to be there for her. So there I was at Montgomery Airfield, staring at what looked like a tiny helicopter. More like a tiny flying sardine can.

My gut tightened. I was there because I couldn’t stay away, because she should have someone who cared about her in times like this. I was there because she was mine. She just didn’t know it yet.

I had it bad.

For a woman you can’t have.

I just needed to keep telling myself that. I also needed to keep telling myself that I wasn’t going to kiss her again. At least not until she asked me.

“Uh, we’re not flying that, are we?”

She grinned. “Yes, we are. It’s called an Ultralight.”

I nodded at her as if any of the words she was saying made sense. “Uh-huh. Still, no.”

“You don’t like to fly?”

“No, I love to fly. Private plane, comfort, and all the liquor I can drink. But this… This is not that.” I shook my head. “This is a flying death trap.”

“It’s not so bad. I happen to have my pilot’s license, so I figured we’d take off, you know, fly a little, see the countryside, and right before we land, I’ll spread Mom’s ashes.”

“Yeah, sure. Why can’t we do that in a real plane? I’ll even take a propeller plane, but not this.”

She chewed her bottom lip. “You don’t have to go. I can do this myself.” The way she tilted her chin up made me want to slam my lips over hers, coaxing her tongue with mine, as I reminded her that if she was doing this, I was doing this. No way in hell I was letting her do this alone.

“Nope. We’re doing this.”

She smiled. “Are you sure? Obviously, you really don’t have to. I appreciate you just even coming.”

“Look, I said I’m going with you, so I’m going with you. Now, why don’t you tell me all the things you really love about flying?”

The smile she gave me was another poleaxe to the chest, and I knew right there that woman had me by the balls. From the moment she’d been pressed up against me in that closet, to the way she moaned