“You destroyed us when I begged you to stay, and you left without a word. Like I was some sort of sacrifice you had to butcher for the greater good. God, I felt so stupid afterward. I gave you all I had, but it wasn’t enough.”
“You were always enough for me. I just wasn’t enough for myself.” He lifted his hands in the air with a tinge of desperation. “I didn’t know how else to let go. Chloe, I was nineteen when I fell in love with you. When I graduated, I knew you’d changed me, but I had no idea how to become my own man. I felt as if I was continuously chasing after you in order to be enough, and eventually, you’d hate what I’d become. Even your father saw it clearly, as I bumbled around trying to decide how I could best support you, be with you, love you. But I had nothing for myself. I was nothing without you, and the realization scared the shit out of me.”
She thought back to those idyllic times when she’d believed everything was perfect. Within their relationship, she’d found not only bliss, but a deep satisfaction that confirmed Owen was the one. She hadn’t been prepared to meet him so young, but she’d remembered her mother’s late-night whispers about her father, and how once they met, her heart had always belonged to him. Like Fate. Destiny. Soul mates rediscovering each other. Chloe had been willing to embrace and accept the magic, she’d always assumed Owen felt the same.
Looking back, had he ever felt as confident about their future? Had he felt trapped? Yes, he was two years younger. Yes, he’d been less settled than an older man who knew his career and path. To her, it was exciting to launch the discovery together—she’d never meant to overshadow.
Obviously, she’d been wrong about everything.
“I can’t believe I’m processing the excuse, ‘It was never you, it was me,’” she said.
He winced. “It’s the truth. I was searching for an answer. When my grandfather’s friend Jim reached out and asked if I’d be interested in coming to LA to intern with Animal Welfare, it seemed like the answer I’d been searching for. He was on the Board, so he could get me the position.”
“I remember when you told me,” she murmured. The memory of that awful night, when he explained he wanted to leave permanently for California, was etched in her vision. “I wanted to try and make it work long distance. You never gave us a chance.”
“Because I needed to be on my own to figure out who I really was.” His jaw clenched, and within his eyes, she glimpsed a flash of shame. “I needed to leave you in order to find myself.”
The brutal words attacked her like stinging knives. “Yet you never thought to share this with me? You figured the best way to accomplish your task was to break up with me, give me no real explanations, and make me think it was something I lacked the entire time?”
“I was stupid. Scared. I was ashamed I couldn’t be the man you thought I was, so it was easier to hide my reasons and escape. If only you knew how much I missed you. Four long years and I never stopped thinking of you. I always planned to come back.”
She choked out a laugh. “Right. And what if I’d decided to marry someone else during that time stretch while you were finding yourself? Did you actually believe I was putting my life on hold for you, Owen?”
He shook his head. “It was a huge risk. I kept tabs on you constantly. Social media, the press, the Bishops, and some friends I’d kept in contact with. But I can’t say I wouldn’t have dropped it all and come back if there was someone you were serious about.”
It was too much. She’d tried to make peace with the fallout, and now he was back, blowing it all back up. A part of her heard and understood his words. As horrible as his actions were, if he’d truly believed he was trying to find himself in order to come back to her, maybe there was a chance of forgiveness.
But she knew for a fact he was a liar.
Chloe stayed silent as the waitress cleared their plates and brought them two coffees. “And now you’ve decided it’s time to stake your claim on me?”
He jerked back slightly, but his voice remained calm. “No. I