The Backup Girlfriend (Grove Valley High #2) - Emma Doherty Page 0,64
she says accusingly, like I had something to do with it—and perhaps I did. It’s definitely something I’ve done in the past, but now the thought of it just makes me tired.
“I didn’t tell anyone to do anything.”
She scoffs. “You didn’t have to. You’re still Abigail Baker, even without Chase by your side. I guess I got that wrong.”
How did we get here?
How did what I thought was friendship lead to this? Have we really just taken shots at each other and struck passive-aggressive blows so much that we can’t even see it’s not normal?
She sighs. “Are we good? Can we go back to normal?”
Normal? If I think back to what our normal used to be, I’m not sure it ever made me happy.
“We’re fine,” I tell her, and we are. I don’t hold any animosity toward her, not really. If I’m totally honest with myself then I’m not surprised by how she behaved; it’s probably not too dissimilar to how I would have behaved not that long ago.
“Okay, great. What are you doing now? Want to hit the mall?”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Brett cut across the hallway, and it reminds me of what he said to me last week.
You get to decide who you are, no one else.
He’s right.
I get to decide who I am and who I surround myself with.
“What are we doing?”
“Huh?”
“Us? Our friendship?”
She looks at me skeptically. “What are you talking about?”
“We’re not nice to each other, Sarah.”
“I just apologized!”
“I’m not talking about that.”
She just stares at me blankly, seemingly not having a clue what I’m talking about.
“We take digs at each other and don’t support each other.”
She still doesn’t say anything.
“We were best friends. We should be each other’s biggest allies, biggest supporters, and we’re not.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, look at Livy and Sophie—they’re what best friends are supposed to be like. They would kill for each other.”
She rolls her eyes. “Not everything is about Livy Chapman, Abigail.”
She’s just proving my point. She’s not even listening to what I’m saying.
“We bring out the worst in each other, and I don’t want to be the worst version of myself anymore. I don’t like it.”
“Look, you’re just having a shitty couple of months, but we’re Abigail and Sarah. We’ve ruled this school for the last couple of years.”
“So?” And I genuinely mean it. What does that actually mean, and who actually cares? “It’s not because people love us. The people who don’t know us don’t want to be around us like they do Chase or Sophie. They’re scared of us. It’s like they think we’re just going to be bitchy and mean.”
She doesn’t have anything to say to that because it’s the truth.
“I don’t want to be bitchy and mean anymore.” I pause. “And I don’t want to be around people who bring out that side of me. I need to be around people who tell me to shut the hell up when I’m being that person.”
She blinks at me.
“So you don’t want to be friends anymore?”
In a word, no.
“I don’t think we can be. Look, I don’t want us to be enemies or anything and I’m not going to say you can’t be anywhere that I am…that’s not it at all. But be honest with yourself—when you go off to college in the fall, do you honestly see yourself staying in touch with me? Do you really think you’ll care to?”
The look on her face tells me I’m right. I know we wouldn’t keep in touch.
I close my locker and smile at her. I don’t hate her or anything, not at all, but I’m indifferent to her now in a way I never thought I’d be only a year ago, or even a few months. Her behavior showed me that, and I think I’m a nicer person without her. If I want to be a better person, I need to surround myself with other people. “I’ll see you around.”
She doesn’t say anything as I walk past her, and I blink back a couple of tears, feeling all the emotions but knowing this is the right thing to do. We definitely had some fun times, but they were far outweighed by our bitchiness and our fighting.
It’s good that I’m walking away.
As I walk down the hallway, Brett appears from a classroom, waving at me as I fall into step with him. “We’re still meeting after school tomorrow, right? Because I can’t do the morning?”