creators,” I added.
“Exactly. Number 1 has always favored the dark side, but more than anything, he enjoys watching a good fight between equally matched opponents. So, to keep things interesting, he pits the universe’s finest creators against its deadliest destroyers. It’s also why Number 1 gave us The List.”
My jaw dropped. “Whoa. Wait a second. You expect me to believe that my ultimate nemesis, The Prayer, the creep who holds the number one ranking on The List of Extraterrestrial Outlaws on Terra Firma, is also the guy who gave us that list?”
“Yes, Daniel. Believe it.” The silence of my overwhelming disbelief was pretty deafening. “In fact,” my father continued as I tried to absorb all of this, “Number 1 not only gave us The List but is also the one who constantly updates it.”
I was glad I was sitting on the ground. Otherwise, I might’ve keeled over. This was absolutely incredible. For his twisted entertainment, Number 1 made sure that we Alien Hunters/Protectors from Alpar Nok always knew where to find the most hideous creatures from all over the galaxy, who had come to Terra Firma to spread death and destruction.
“Did he enjoy watching me take down Attila outside the bat cave?” I asked.
“I’m sure he did.”
“And what about Number 19, back in Portland? The one that was part man, part jellyfish, and part chain saw?”
“I’m sure Number 1 was greatly amused.”
“So, what? He’s like Zeus up on Mount Olympus, looking down from his lofty throne and drooling with delight as mere mortals fight to the death for his enjoyment?”
My father nodded. I thought about all the alien baddies I had hunted down and bumped off The List. Especially Number 6, the planet annihilator who, years earlier, had killed the real Dana, Willy, Joe, and Emma back on Alpar Nok.
Now I was learning that my mission had been Number 1’s entertainment. My battles, struggles, and sorrows were all just exciting new episodes of this deranged deity’s favorite action-packed TV show.
“When I refused to fight Number 2 in Kansas,” my dad continued, “Number 1 demanded that I give him back The List.”
“Why didn’t you just call off the game and give it to him?”
“Because I knew you would need The List to protect this planet, Daniel. The other side, the alien outlaws, had no intention of calling it quits. As we grow older, Daniel, we realize that, when things don’t go our way, we can’t just pack up our toys, call it quits, and head for home. If I had surrendered The List, Earth would have been destroyed several times over.”
“I know. But if Number 1 really wants a fair fight between me and Number 2, why does The List draw a total and complete blank on Abbadon?”
“Does it?”
“Yeah. There’s nothing about his planet of origin, his—”
“Look again, Daniel.”
“What?”
“No more secrets. The time has come. You need to know everything.”
Chapter 70
I REACHED INTO my backpack and pulled out the sleek, paper-thin laptop I hadn’t consulted since my last visit to the bat cave, when it kept coming up blank on Number 2.
I swiped a fingertip across the glass screen and the ultra-secret Wiki about superpowered psychopathic aliens whirred to life.
“Number 2,” said my father.
The computer obeyed his command and started rapidly shuffling through its mug shots of alien outlaws like the flying-album-cover view on iTunes. Two seconds later, the montage stuttered to a stop on a hideous image of Number 2 in his full demon mode.
Beneath the picture, I now saw tons of information.
Number 2. AKA ABBADON, SATAN, THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS, THE DESTROYER, IBLIS, BEELZEBUB, ANGRA MAINYU…
The Known Aliases list scrolled on for several pages. Apparently, The List had gone from knowing nothing all the way to TMI.
KNOWN PHYSICAL APPEARANCES.
I just skimmed this section, since I had already seen Number 2 shape-shift his way from winged-back demon to a smooth newscaster to the grim reaper. The guy was the great pretender, the great deceiver, and a quick-change artist.
Finally, the screen filled with the information I had been desperate to discover.
When I read it, I sort of wished it was still a blank.
PLANET OF ORIGIN: Alpar Nok.
I looked to my father. “He’s one of us?”
“Yes, Daniel. He commands the same incredible powers that you do.”
“He can use his imagination…”
“… to destroy whatever you can create with yours. He can make you see things that aren’t really there. Think things that aren’t really true.”
I nodded slowly as I mentally cataloged my own incredible superpowers. Not the standard comic book action-hero stuff, like