Anything but Minor - Kate Stewart Page 0,75

in the ass, broken toe, dry lips.

Alice: How is that brawn working out for you now?

Rafe: I’m on the bus, baby, headed home.

Alice: I want it hard.

Rafe: You’ve turned into a nerdy pervert.

Alice: Whatever, hard please.

Rafe: Gladly. I’ll throw in some cuffs, rope, and anal play.

Alice: I’ll have to do some research.

Rafe: You do that and get back to me. Just research with one of your pornos.

Alice: You looked at my browsing history!

Rafe: Every chance I get. You cover your tracks mostly, so I take it to the bathroom when you aren’t looking. Did you really research the average size of the penis?

Rafe: What, no quick quip? No come back? At least you know you won the penis lottery. ☺

Rafe: I miss your face. I need to look into those beautiful brown eyes.

Alice: I’m sorry about your game.

Rafe: Fuck the game. I want you here. I want to be inside you. Two more to play and the weather is shit.

Alice: Then I’ll come to you.

Rafe: Really?

Alice: I’m on my way.

Rafe: Seriously, you’re coming? It’s a four hour drive and it’s late.

Alice: Text me the address.

Rafe: Baby, it’s raining too hard.

Alice: Do you want me to text Andy for it?

Alice: I just flew for three hours and almost cried when I touched down. I miss it. Can you talk? I feel like I’m about to crack.

Alice: I know you’re busy with pre-meetings. Two more days and you’ll be home. This really sucks sometimes.

Rafe: Baby, I’m sorry, are you there?

Alice: Rafe! I just played golf and it was sooo boring. Seriously, it was the beer that got me through it. I’m thinking men drink beer to get through boring rituals they create, thus making said ritual far more entertaining rather than to admit it was just a bad idea. I mean, couldn’t they’ve just said, “Nah...it was good in theory but far too boring to execute.” Golf...no.

Rafe: Alice, I’m pretty sure you need to Google the origin of the game of golf.

Alice: I still say they were drunk when they came up with it.

Rafe: Spoken like a new alcoholic. Take up knitting instead?

Alice: Har har.

Rafe: You’re Googling knitting now, aren’t you?

Alice: I just got finished with Dutch’s yard.

Rafe: You are something else, Alice. That had to take you all day!

Alice: Two actually. I really stink at yardwork. I can hardly move.

Rafe: I’ve got two hands ready to take the sting out.

Alice: I was hoping you would say that.

Rafe: Are you alone?

Alice: Why?

Rafe: Because I want you to pull down your panties.

Alice: Thank you for the roses. I love them.

Rafe: You deserve them. I’ve got to go warm up.

Alice: Go get ’em, Bullet. XO

Rafe: Did you just hang up on me?

Alice: You are being paranoid. I’m not dealing with it.

Rafe: I’m four hundred fucking miles away and you send me a screenshot of you and some guy hanging out.

Alice: I was bored. He’s married and he was just helping me with my painting. I was showing you my painting! You want me to sit at home two or three weeks out the month? Not happening.

Rafe: I can’t fucking deal with this right now.

Alice: Then don’t.

Alice: Fighting with you hurts so much, Rafe. Please don’t ignore me. I miss you every day. I can’t sit at home thinking about you. Nothing helps. My movies don’t help. I think of you and only you. I wasn’t doing anything wrong.

Rafe: I just don’t think you know what that did to me. I know I handled that wrong, but I just can’t see that shit, Alice.

Alice: You won’t.

Rafe: I love you.

Alice: I love you, too.

Rafe: We okay?

Alice: Always.

Rafe: Hours ago, you were in my bed. You were telling me some usual random shit and all I could think about was sitting on this bus again and how badly I would want to be back in that bed hearing you go on about Michael Jackson’s pet giraffe and all the other exotic animals owned by celebrities. To answer your question from earlier, no, I will not be buying a monkey or an albino snake. You make me laugh, Alice. You keep me going. You are the best thing that has happened to me in a very long time. If you keep waiting, baby, I’ll keep coming home.

Alice: I’ve got you.

Rafe: I fucking love you.

I was in my office as I waited on Rafe to get back from a four-day stint in Myrtle. He’d pitched an amazing game, and I couldn’t wait to celebrate with him. He’d called minutes