bit more stern and nervousness rushes through me, hitting me in the center of my gut. I’ve been debating saying this to him, and it’s only because I feel fucking crazy for saying it.
“I’m not coming back, Damon.”
He draws his brows together. “What the fuck. Where?”
“To America. I’m going to stay here with Dante. Not here, but in his house in Chihuahua.”
Damon takes a step back and throws his hands in the air. “Is this some sort of fucking joke? You have some sorta thing for knights in shining armor or somethin’? You fuckin’ got Stockholm syndrome?”
“Stockholm is when you fall in love with your captor. Dante isn’t keeping me prisoner.” I say, getting a bit pissed at his reaction. I knew it was going to be bad, but I didn’t think about it being this rough.
“Damon, I need you to try and understand. Life wasn’t going so well for me before Lucien had abducted me. I thought I was going to die there . . . when I got out I started seeing life a little bit differently, and I need to do what’s right for me. For the first time in my life, I’m putting myself first. I need to stay here, brother. A place where no one holds my past against me. I need this fresh start.”
“Yo, let go of our big sis.” Ashton says, shoving Damon out of the way. Ashton wraps his arms around me and so does Lyon. I feel like one of those dolls where the eyes come out of the body when they’re squeezed too tight.
“Whoa, alright. Let me go. Both of you. You’re gonna suffocate me!”
Both of these two knuckleheads bust into laughter. Both my younger brothers have grown a bit of facial hair. Ashton must be in the gym every day because he’s at least grown twice the size he was when I last saw him, and it’s all muscle. I doubt he even has an ounce of fat on his body. On the other hand, Lyon is clad in what must at least be a three-thousand-dollar suit. Our mother always said he was the smart one, and damn it shows.
Meanwhile, I peer my gaze past the two of them and see Rose. Short, tiny, little Rose is sitting on the couch, smiling up at me. “You wanna go get some air? I’m sure these three will talk you to death.”
She’s giving me an out, and man I’m taking it. “Yes, let’s go. This way,” I say, hearing the click of her wedges against the tile floor. We both walk onto the back patio.
“I’d hug you, but we’re not huggers.”
It’s true. Rose and I are . . . pretty tough chicks. If you ask me, we were much easier to raise than our brothers. They’re the ones who always ran crying to Mom. “Thanks. I’m certain those three are going to get a lifetime amount in.” I say, sitting on the stone wall.
Rose follows my lead and sits beside me. “All things considered, you look fabulous.”
“Wow, did I just get a compliment?”
“Stop being an asshole. I assumed you’d look like hell, but obviously I’m mistaken.”
“Did Damon tell you I took a couple weeks to decompress after it happened?”
She nods. “Yeah, I would’ve needed the same if I were in your shoes as well. Or, at least I think I would’ve.”
“You probably would. It’s a lot to process once you’re out.” I mumble, thinking about how two weeks could’ve made a difference.
Pressure is applied on my hand, so I look down and see Rose has grabbed it. “She wouldn’t have wanted you to see her like that, ‘Mar. Mom was sick. She was so sick.”
“I don’t understand what happened.”
“She was misdiagnosed and by the time she got to the right physician her cancer had metastasized. Instead of given months, we were given weeks.”
Tears threaten to fall and I try so hard to not allow them, but they come rushing through. “I wish I could’ve seen her one last time.”
“She didn’t want any of us to see her the way we did. Trust me. Before it got bad, she told me how she wished it could’ve been a sudden thing, ‘cause she didn’t want us to watch her wither away.”
“I wish it made it better b—”
“It doesn’t. Nothing will make it better.” Rose cuts me off.
“Yeah, something like that.” I mutter.
“I need to tell you something.” Rose says out of nowhere, changing her tone.
I glance to her. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah. I can’t