holding me against the wall as he washed me. My hair. My body. He covered me with tender kisses, and when we were both cleaned, he carried me to the counter in the bathroom.
I was dried.
He wrapped a towel around my hair.
When he was done, he stepped back, his hands on both sides of me at the counter. A small, teasing smile lurked over his mouth. “You want me to dress you, too?”
I reached for him, everything in me feeling boneless, but content. Hella content. I was almost purring by now. I grabbed for his neck, but Cross waited for my response.
I shook my head. “But you can pull some clothes out and put them on the bed for me?”
He nodded, his eyes shuddering closed. He bent, one more kiss, and whispered against them, “I love you.”
I drank that in, inhaling him and his touch. “I love you, too.”
He pressed another kiss to the corner of my mouth before straightening, walking naked back out to the bedroom.
It was after I had dressed and was ready to head for Coug r Lanes that I realized the full effects of what Cross had done. He erased every moment of last night for me. There was no more darkness in me. He pushed it out, bringing in his love, his care, and with it was his goodness.
I went to work, going after the bad guys, and the old Bren was so far down, I didn’t feel her at all.
CROSS
Bren took off for work and I headed to the kitchen.
I should’ve been tired, but after the last couple hours with Bren, I was jazzed. Hyped. The adrenaline would leave me this afternoon. I knew I’d be drained, but before then, I just had a couple of classes to hit up. Smelling the coffee had already been brewed, I was surprised to see Jordan at the table. A cup in hand, resting on the table. A plate with toast and two eggs untouched in front of him.
“You’re not going to class?”
He’d been staring outside but swung his head my way with effort. He grimaced, heavy bags under his eyes. His hair was also messed up. He looked like shit.
He shook his head. “It’s a skip day for me.”
I poured myself some coffee and went to sit in a chair across from him. “Z went in?”
He nodded, not saying a word.
He went back to staring out the window and I reached over, sliding his plate in front of me. I eyed his fork, but I didn’t need it. The eggs were piled on the toast, and I made a nice egg sandwich. They’d been fried, too. Damn fucking good.
He looked back, his eyes unfocused. “How’s Bren doing?”
Swallowing, I wiped my mouth and sat back. “She’s fine. Woke up hard, but she walked out of here easy.” I wasn’t explaining any more than that, so I was hoping he was getting what I was saying. I wasn’t about to tell him I fucked the bad out of her, because that’s, in essence, what I did. The nice words would’ve said more like I loved out the cold or some shit like that, but after this morning and last night, I wasn’t in a big sharing mood.
He nodded, rubbing at his jaw. He needed a shave. I was betting he wasn’t going to get to that today.
He murmured, distracted, “That’s good. I was worried about her last night.”
“You and Tab talk last night when you took her home?”
He shook his head, that unfocused look just increasing as he looked outside once more. “I don’t have a clue what to say.”
I frowned, lowering the sandwich back to my plate.
I tried to put myself in his place.
If Bren had done that? Cheated on me to end things so she could force herself to touch another guy to help save her mom? I couldn’t. Bren would never do that. She’d knife the guy, opting to go to prison instead. That was more Bren. Whoring herself? That wasn’t Bren, but if she’d been in a position where she had to do that?
I felt filleted right then and there. A knife taken to my stomach, one deep clean line from left to right and all my insides were spilling out. Add to that sensation a shit ton of murderous urges—gutting the guy wouldn’t have cut it. Nothing would take that poison out of me. Cancer. That’s exactly what Jordan has inside of him now.
I got it. I did. I see why Bren moved