permanently was one of the happiest parts of his mother’s job. She’d been instrumental in adopting him, Jackson and Rafe and making them all a family. He didn’t know what would have happened to the three of them without having her and his dad come into their lives. “That’s great news.”
“Yes, it is. Both for the kids and for the parents. Let’s go get some coffee. I’ve been working nonstop since seven. I could use a break and a chat.”
And by chat, she meant she’d listen and he’d talk. His mom had always had good insight about her sons, always knew whenever they were happy or sad or upset about something. It’s why he loved the only woman he’d ever considered a mother. Not only was she an amazing woman and a fantastic social worker who cared about all the children she worked with, she was also an incredible mom.
Kal had always felt closest to his mother. He’d felt an instant connection to her from the moment she’d come into his life. He’d never felt close to his birth mom, hadn’t felt a connection to her because she’d never been affectionate with him, but he never knew why. Her distance hurt him as a child, especially when she hadn’t stood up for him when his stepdad had started beating on him.
He’d talked a lot to Laurel about it after they’d all been adopted, had always wondered why his birth mother hadn’t loved him enough to protect him. Laurel had told him she didn’t have an answer for that, that only his birth mother knew why, but Laurel suggested she’d probably been abused long before Kal showed up, and she’d moved from one abusive man to another. Mom explained that his birth mother had likely been suffering from PTSD and was so afraid for herself that she couldn’t show love for him. And that fear for her own safety kept her from intervening when Kal’s stepdad had beat him.
Kal could still remember the nights he’d lain huddled in his bed under the covers, trying to muffle the sounds of his mother’s screaming while she endured the beatings. It had taken him a long time and a lot of conversations to come to grips with the fact that he’d been relieved that it was her this time and not him. He carried a lot of guilt over that, and that guilt warred with his anger at his mother for not protecting him—for not doing something to protect both of them.
It hadn’t been his fault that his stepfather was an abusive monster. None of his circumstances had been his fault. He’d been too young to take care of himself, too young to defend his mother. When he realized she was never going to step up and get them out of the situation, he’d run out of a sense of self-preservation. He’d never been happier than to find Jackson and Rafe on the streets. For the first time in his life, he’d had a family. And then he’d been rescued by Laurel and Josh, and Laurel had been the one to put in the work, to take the time to help him heal.
She had talked to him about his past, had helped him open up about the abuses he’d endured. She’d given him an understanding that he hadn’t had as a child, and maybe a little bit of forgiveness for his birth mother. It had allowed him to leave that part of his life in the past and move forward with the adoptive parents he had grown to love so much.
He had never known what it had taken for Laurel and Josh to gain custody of him. Had Laurel tracked down his mother, and had his mother just signed over her rights? Had she died? He’d never asked, hadn’t wanted to know.
Some questions were best left unanswered. And the past belonged in the past.
His mom brewed two coffees, and they sat at the kitchen table, evoking memories of so many times they’d sat together and talked things out.
“Did your shift go okay?” she asked.
Kal shrugged. “We had a close-quarters rescue. I was on rope duty.”
She waited a beat before asking. “And?”
“My mind drifted, and one of my team members called me on it.”
“Okay. So what’s on your mind that you couldn’t concentrate on your job?”
Kal took a sip of coffee. “Hannah.”
She nodded and leaned back in the chair. “I see. Good or bad?”
“I don’t know. I mean, I think about her all the time.