have a last name? How does he sign his Christmas cards? Khristos Aphrodite? Khristos hyphen Goddess of Love’s Spawn?”
“That’s a reason to chase him out of your life?”
She didn’t respond. She couldn’t.
But Ingrid wasn’t letting go. “Still avoiding the question.”
“Because he has a life, too.”
“Nope. That’s not why you did it, Quinn. If you’re going to do all this reality, let’s do it right. You did it because you’re afraid you’re getting too carried away with your romantic expectations again.”
“How do you know?”
“My sleeping bag has ears. I was right out here on the floor last night. I know. You showed him your Cucamonga and he showed you his man-bits, and now you’re freaked out.”
God, she was smart. “So? What does that matter? It doesn’t change the fact that I’ve never gotten a single relationship right.”
“No. It says you’ve just picked the wrong men.”
Quinn remained silent. Wasn’t that the same thing?
“It also says you’ve gone too far the other side of reality. Come back before you miss something really great.”
“Before it was too much romance, not enough caution. Now it’s too much caution? Make up your mind,” she said on a groan.
“No. Now it’s just right, Quinn.”
“How can you know it’s just right? It’s too soon to tell. We just met each other, Ingrid. Things like that don’t happen overnight.”
Ingrid grabbed her hand and held it to her cheek. “Sometimes, they do. In the past, if anyone defended love at first sight, it would have been you, sitting on the bleachers, megaphone in hand. But if you can’t defend it right now, I will for you. Real love can happen in a glance or a touch or a week. You should know that after the matches you’ve made in the last few days. You’ve seen it. That’s all I’m saying.”
“Hey, Chatty Cathys, you two wanna go get ice cream?” Nina asked. “Marty and Wanda think it’d be fun to walk in the shitstorm out there and eat something cold when it’s twelve degrees out.”
“Need some quiet time?” Ingrid whispered in her ear.
“Please,” she whispered back, utterly miserable.
“I’m in,” Ingrid said, giving Quinn’s shoulder a squeeze before rising.
Nina nudged her with a knee. “I’m gonna be right outside with Carl. Right on the sidewalk. Promised I’d help him build a snowman. Fuck if I don’t regret buying him and Charlie Frozen. Anyway, you’re not alone. All ya gotta do is give a yell if you need me. And for the record, you should flippin’ listen to Ingrid and rethink this plan, Love Maker. It’s fucking stupid.” She reached down and chucked Quinn under the chin before gathering Carl and heading outside.
After everyone dropped a kiss on her forehead and shuffled out, silence fell over her apartment. She struggled to sit up, letting the gel-pack drop to the floor, her eyes sore from keeping the tears at bay.
Her line of sight fell on the sweater Khristos had left behind, his things in a neat pile by the side of the couch, and she ached.
Ached to see him, ached to talk to him. Ached.
Like someone had torn off a limb.
In all her failed relationships, she’d never felt quite like this when they’d ended. Though, technically, theirs had never even begun. He hadn’t stopped her from walking away.
How would it have played out if he’d reminded her she’d gone Pygmalion on him and fallen for the teacher out of idol worship? What if he’d told her she still had her head in the clouds, dreaming up scenarios that didn’t exist? What if he’d said exactly what she’d said to him? We had sex. Yay! Thanks for a good time. Good luck in all future endeavors.
Quinn let her head fall to her hands. Quite possibly, this was the smartest thing to do—just plow forward.
But what if it isn’t? What if you didn’t give him the chance to say anything because you were so busy dunking in the pool of reality, you forgot to come up for air?
“Alone at last,” a sultry voice whispered into the dim light of her living room.
Quinn’s head whipped upward. She scanned the room, her eyes darting around every corner.
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to take a bitch out when she’s constantly surrounded by a posse like yours? Goddess, they’re an annoying bunch. All that food and hugs and kisses and broccoli. I should torture you before I kill you, just because this has all been such a hassle. I think I actually broke a nail.”
She fought