You Only (Cameron Farms Book 1) - Melanie Jayne Page 0,29

It’s OK to say it out loud, we can’t change it. You wanted the chance to seal your career. You knew that the D.A. wasn’t that smart. Between you, Izzy and the legal brains at Benton and Lee, you knew you had a very good chance of winning. You had the chance to take your career and reputation to the next level and you took it. You chose your career over me, over us.”

“I took a case that was offered to me because I could defend the client well.” Finn’s spoke through gritted teeth.

“And further your career. Just say it, we can’t change the past. Your career was more important than our relationship. If you can’t say it out loud then try admitting it to yourself when you are alone.” Her tone was bitter and she bit her lip.

“Jesus. Yes, I wanted to make a name for myself. I wanted you to be proud of me. I needed the success. I needed to show that I was worthy of you.” His words came faster and louder.

“I know,” she yelled at him. She paused to pull herself together. She made sure that her voice was softer because yelling would not make him hear her any better. “Over the years, I came to understand that. But that case, the people involved, I couldn’t forgive you. Even today, I’ve accepted it, but I still haven’t gotten over it. You had me and my respect, taking on that case didn’t get you more, it made you lose me.”

He ran his hand through his hair. “So, you’re saying that if I hadn’t taken the case, we would have been fine?”

Hale sat back in her chair, pulled one knee up, and hugged it to her chest. “I wish I could say yes, but I can’t. You were a man, mature for your age with a goal and the plan to achieve it. God, I used to admire your drive, I wished it would rub off on me.” She glanced toward the window but saw nothing. “I was rudderless back then. When we met, I was taking a few classes at the satellite campus and worrying about nothing more than what I was going to wear that day. I didn’t have any goals, I didn’t need them because I was the Cameron Farms princess.” She sighed. “I fell in love with you because you were so driven. I knew that you were going to be successful. I mean, look at everything you have accomplished in your life. But I had parts that were broken inside of me. They would have become apparent over time. Maybe I could have gotten help here, but I might have gotten worse and turned out to be like Lydia.”

“I loved you.” He said it with force.

“And I loved you. Don’t you ever question that again.” Those words were torn from her soul. “But that girl would have made you unhappy, and not been able to keep your interest long term. She was a follower, who just went along with the group. Her immaturity would have bored you senseless within five years.”

His eyes shifted away from her. “You don’t know that.” He didn’t sound so firm in that belief.

She nodded her head a few times. “I do, because I started to hate myself right before my twenty-second birthday. It started with some little things, like the luncheons and parties. I’d been there done that. I was drinking a little extra to make them more interesting, and with my mother’s history, that scared me. One day Maria overheard me yell at a saleslady over the phone, and she remarked that I sounded just like Lydia. She even told that to my dad, he called me into his office to talk to me about how I treated others. I admitted to myself that I was turning into a selfish woman, who felt she was above certain people. Those were troubling personality defects, too much like my mother. I didn’t want to turn into her.” Her voice cracked on the last sentence and Christ, there was wetness on her cheeks. She hastily swiped her hand over them to catch the tears. She felt so vulnerable crying in front of him. She took a few deep breaths and continued.

“You had the problem with me working, remember? I was working part-time for Wes. I loved accounting. I loved the surety of the numbers. Finally, I’d found something that I wanted to do, that I was good at. I