me the final push. I sink my teeth into his shoulder, muffling my shout. Drawing my head away, I seize his hand as the pleasure rolls through.
“Fuck me, Ethan,” I say, barely audible.
I cling onto him, waiting for him to follow through. Instead, he peels me from him and steps back, panting. He watches me as he drags a shaking hand through his hair, eyes now obscured by his curls.
“Don’t stop,” I say and reach out to him.
“You think I’d hold you against the wall and fuck you like an animal? Is that what you want when you think about me?” he says hoarsely. “Do you not understand that the dragon in me would destroy you?”
A shiver of delicious fear runs down my spine. “You wouldn’t destroy me.” I ache from his rough touch, more than ready for him to take the step he’s holding back from. “You said you couldn’t control yourself, but you have. You won’t hurt me.”
His response is halfway between a growl and a laugh. “If you could see into my mind right now, Eloise, you’d run the hell out of this room.”
I’m fuelled by nothing but the lust he’s poured into me and the effect he’s had. I want what no other girl has managed to get from Ethan; I don’t care what risk I’m taking.
“Ethan,” I move towards him.
“Eloise,” he whispers in warning. “Don’t be fucking stupid. I want to hurt you and if you don’t walk away, I will.”
My mouth stings from the harsh kisses, body raw with pleasure at his touch and even though he’s given me the release I ached for, I want more. So much more.
His jaw clenches hard. “I want to hurt you. Don’t let me.”
I rest my head against the wall and tremble as the pleasure begins to ebb, pulling me back down to the reality of what he’s saying.
His power over me, physically and sexually, almost frightens me, but this guy is the kindest person here. I’ve never dealt with shifters, much less one who’s stuck between beast and man, and my hammering heart skips a beat for another reason.
Who is Ethan at this moment?
“I said I want to hurt you,” he says louder. “Aren’t you listening to me?”
With trembling fingers, I fasten the buttons on my shirt, his words finally registering how vulnerable I am. He turns away as I fasten my jeans and frustrated tears push at my eyes.
There’s hot and cold, and there’s downright cruelty. But who pushed us to this point? Not Ethan.
He doesn’t move and I stare at his broad back, wishing my mind-reading skills worked. Is he waiting for me to leave? I’d swear at him for what he’s done, but I don’t know what I’m dealing with. If I show I’m angry, will that provoke what he’s denying?
“I guess I’ll see you at breakfast,” I mumble.
Ethan tips his head back and stares at the ceiling and hurt runs through me as strongly as the pleasure did before. He’s right. I’m naïve. I know nothing about the people here or the world they belong to; the one my parents hid me from my whole life.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers and turns back to me.
As his hand gently cups the back of my head, he kisses me with a softness that reignites hope. I return his kiss, my smarting lips almost numb from earlier.
As I lace my hands round his neck, he gently peels them away and shakes his head at me. “I would never forgive myself, Eloise.”
The hug he gives me squeezes the tears I’ve held back, not only because of his affection but because I know Ethan rarely touches people. “You’re capable of more than violence,” I whisper against his neck.
His arms tighten and he holds my head to him as if he doesn’t want to stop. Ethan’s reluctance to let me go matches my desire to stay here, but we have to listen to the truth. If something in Ravenhold is influencing him and dragging the violent man back to the surface, I’m not safe.
After moments that feel like a lifetime, he kisses my forehead and apologises again. My fingers tremble on the door handle as I leave. Relieved nobody is nearby to witness the flushed, dishevelled witch leaving, I make my way back along the hallway and into the reality I’m more frightened of than I am of Ethan.
Chapter Thirty-Four
I’m already under scrutiny by shifter girls for Zeke’s interest in me, and I’m nervous to approach him the next