When Darkness Ends (Moments in Boston #3) - Marni Mann Page 0,64
if I was running a fever. “You usually spend your nights off with Ashe; it’s unlike you to be home.”
Her fingers slid to my cheek before she acknowledged that she felt no temperature.
I caught her hand before it dropped, holding it between mine. “I’m fine, Gran.”
“I could tell the second you walked in here that you were not fine.” She sat up straighter, and the blanket fell from her chest, which I immediately fixed. “When you hurt, baby, I hurt. Tell me what’s bothering you.”
I exhaled as I looked toward the window, unable to hide anything from her. “I was just in my room, thinking about the future.”
“Always the worrier.” She gently moved her thumb across my palm. “You were in this same place right before you two became a couple and again when your feelings for him grew.” She lifted my chin, causing our eyes to connect. “You have to realize, you can’t change the outcome. What’s meant to happen between you and Ashe is already written. So, stop stressing about the what-ifs and the unknowns.” Her eyes moved back and forth between mine. “Life is going to happen; you don’t have the power to stop it, dollface. So, tuck your body into a ball and roll with each bump.”
“But I love him and …”
“And he’s madly, deeply in love with you.” She leaned forward, getting closer, lowering her voice when she said, “I promise you, whatever is meant to be will be. But neither of you has the power to control fate, so stop trying.” Her lips went to my cheek, where she kissed me so softly.
I kissed her back and continued staring at her, even after she pulled away, watching her take a drink of her tea.
She had a point. There were certain things I couldn’t control, and this was one, but that didn’t ease the emotions in my chest.
“Are you going to Ashe’s?”
I nodded. “I’m supposed to be there now.”
“Dollface, what are you waiting for?”
“Answers. Clarity.” I shrugged. “A crystal ball.”
“When you stumble upon one of those, will you send it to me?” She lifted my hand up to her mouth, kissing the backs of my fingers like a hen would peck at grain. “You’re forgetting to live in the moment because you’re so stuck in the future.” She turned quieter. “Stop it, baby.”
“You’re right. Again.”
She smiled. “Now, go along. I don’t want him to worry.”
I stood from the couch and was heading toward my room to grab my things when she called out my name, causing me to turn around.
“Bring those boys some of the cookies you made me yesterday. Lord knows I won’t be able to eat them all.”
I grinned suspiciously. “Are you sure you want to share?”
“Just save me a few. The ones with the extra peanut butter hunks on top.”
I laughed. “I love you, Gran.”
“From the sun to the moon and every star in between, baby.”
Forty-Seven
Before
Ashe
All three envelopes sat on my desk, unopened. They hadn’t arrived on the same day. In fact, two of them had come a few weeks apart. But I had promised myself I wouldn’t break their seals until all decisions came in. I didn’t want to get my hopes up or let down. I didn’t want to start planning my future until I knew every option that was available.
Dylan had threatened to open them. He was just so fucking excited for me; he wanted to start celebrating and was positive I’d gotten into all three med schools. But I’d applied to the toughest, most challenging programs in the country with the hardest acceptance requirements. There was a good chance I hadn’t gotten into any, and I didn’t have a backup plan. It was either one of these three or I wasn’t going at all.
That thought alone was enough to make my chest ache.
But that was also another reason why I’d waited. I didn’t want to be punched in the face on three different days. I wanted one hard smack, and then I’d move on.
I’d waited long enough.
It was time.
I slid my finger under each envelope flap and set the letters on top, still folded.
The first I opened was from UPenn, and I scanned a few sentences, congratulations immediately popping out at me.
“Fuck yes,” I whispered, my eyes closing as I processed what this meant.
The hard work, the long nights, the no sleep, the endless studying to get the best score I was capable of achieving on my MCATs.