We Have Till Dawn - Cara Dee Page 0,60

glance at the alarm clock told me it was four minutes past seven.

Perhaps I hadn’t matured as much these past two years as I wanted to believe. After quitting with Tina last time, I’d given myself a big ass-kicking for blowing through the money I’d earned while working for her. Granted, it meant I had one sweet fucking collection of instruments now, but that meant fuck-all when I had to crash with my brother.

While I’d saved most of the money from Gideon, I’d shown my immaturity in other ways.

My phone buzzed with a message, and I saw Gideon’s name on the display.

Can I come now instead, please? I’ve calmed down sufficiently, and I need to see you.

I sniffled and typed in a response.

Yeah, sure.

I estimated that would give me approximately fifteen minutes to compose mys—

Two firm knocks on the door interrupted my thought.

Are you kidding me?

No, it could be Ruby. Maybe. For some reason. Plus, Gideon had a key.

I threw off the covers and grabbed as many wadded-up tissues as I could, and I threw them under the sink on my way to the door. My heart slowly but surely crept up in my throat, only for it to get lodged when I saw Gideon through the peephole. He was already here. And he wasn’t dressed for success. He was wearing Yankee sweats and a hoodie.

I opened the door, figuring I was gonna do this without Instagram filters and fake smiles. I couldn’t pretend, and there was no time to try to look like I hadn’t wept like a baby earlier anyway.

He looked about as tired as I felt, and he frowned when his gaze landed on my face.

“I know, I look like shit.” I opened the door wider and let him in.

He shook his head and stopped near the kitchen table. He was scanning the place for changes.

I locked the door again and returned to the bed. “Claire busy picking out a wedding dress?” Ouch, too bitter. Well, there was no taking backsies, but I was keeping my mouth shut now. After pulling up the covers, I pulled up my knees too and hugged them to my chest.

Gideon was still frowning. “I highly doubt that considering I broke off our engagement—and she swiftly terminated our friendship as well.”

I felt my forehead crease with confusion.

He did what?

The words didn’t really compute.

“But you chose her,” I said.

More frowning. At least he left the kitchen and moved closer. “Excuse me? I did no such thing.”

My heart stayed in my throat, for a whole new reason, and it started beating furiously. “You said—I heard you, Gideon. You said you had to proceed with your plan. Your plan to marry her—it was your plan all along.”

He stared at me as if he were trying to solve a difficult math problem, all while I went to war against the hope that threatened to shoot out of me. If there was the slightest chance…

“You’re mistaken.” He sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled up one of his legs so he could face me properly. “I was a nervous wreck all morning because I had invited Claire over to tell her I could no longer go through with the engagement. Then I took a walk with Chester to center myself, and when I came back, I saw you standing there. It threw me. It wasn’t part of my plan.”

I blinked. The words slithered through my brain too slowly, as if a part of me was scared shitless to believe them.

“It became too much, Nicky. With your declaration and Claire due to arrive at any moment, it was more than I could handle.” He swallowed and stared at his lap. “You were also saying all the right things before I’d had the chance to admit the worst things about myself. So, I…I couldn’t stave off the panic. And then she showed up, and I saw the magazines she was carrying.” He blew out a breath and scrubbed his hands over his face. “She’d misunderstood me too. She’d thought I’d ended my ‘experiment’ with you early—and that I was ready to plan our wedding.”

That was why he had asked for the pause button…

He hadn’t been able to handle everything at once, so he’d told me he needed to stick to the plan—which was, end things with Claire, and then he and I could talk.

My eyes filled with unshed tears quicker than I could’ve anticipated, and I pressed my lips together to keep from making any weird