touching him. My hands roamed his torso greedily, and it felt so damn good to be unshackled. “You’re a sexy man, Gideon. Out of this world sexy.”
“Thank you. So are you.”
I grinned. That sounded like one of those well-rehearsed, automatic responses he had in his arsenal. I’d heard a couple of them before.
“How are you feeling now?” I murmured.
He shivered. “Aroused and anxious.”
I could work with that.
“Can I get on your lap?” I wondered. “You can close your eyes if you want.”
He tensed up, and I was the jackass who focused on the definition of his muscles, but then he nodded jerkily, so hopefully his anxiety was manageable.
I made sure to touch him when I moved around him to get on his lap, just so he always knew exactly where I was. His eyes were closed, but I knew that handsome face. I’d seen it from afar last night.
Whereas I hadn’t shaved in a few days and had some scruff going on, he was clean-shaven and rocked a sexy, cut jaw. There was something about sharp lines that drove me bonkers.
He drew a breath through his nose and clenched his jaw, and it looked like he was struggling to relax. In an attempt to help him, I guided his hands up my thighs. I wanted him to feel me the way I did him, now that we were finally in this together.
“I love seeing you.” I cupped his jaw and leaned in, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
“You do?” He let out a shaky breath and tightened his grip on my hips.
“Fuck yeah. Who doesn’t love seeing a gorgeous man?” I pressed my forehead to his and scooted a little closer, wanting his cock where it should be. “I think it’s safe for you to open your eyes.”
He shook his head minutely. “I don’t want to see any judgment.”
I furrowed my brow and inched back. “Why the fuck would I judge you?”
“I don’t know. Society as a whole is judgmental. No one wants to be common, but everyone wants to be normal. We judge what sticks out and what we don’t understand.”
He wasn’t wrong, and I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to try to fit into a bunch of boxes that weren’t made for me on a daily basis. I’d gotten a taste of it when I came out to a few friends in school who hadn’t already figured out I was gay, but that was about it. With my brother paving the way, I’d grown up in an accepting community, even with the church and old-school family members.
“I’m sure I’ve judged someone wrongly in my life,” I admitted, smoothing my fingers over his brow. He appeared so troubled, and I didn’t like it. “It’s easy to think you get something just by imagining it. But you don’t have anything to worry about with me, Gideon. I admire a person who will be true to himself and go after what he wants. That’s what you’re trying to do here, isn’t it?”
He grimaced a little. “It’s a compromise at best.”
I hoped to hear more about it, because I was curious, but it would have to wait. Gideon was opening his eyes, and it felt like I’d been sucker-punched. He had the most soulful peepers I’d seen. Rich brown with gold and green flecks at the center, brimming with vulnerability and desire.
I smiled. “You were in Brooklyn last night.”
He quickly broke eye contact and dropped his gaze to my shoulder, and fuck me if he didn’t get a reddish tone to his cheeks. A grown man blushing—I’d seen everything now. And it was hella endearing.
“I told you I get intrigued,” he replied defensively.
“Hey, I’m not complaining.” I grinned and kissed the corner of his mouth. I wanted more; I wanted to kiss him properly. “Did you like what you saw?”
“No,” he answered quietly. “It didn’t satisfy my curiosity.”
Nothing wrong with that in my book. I licked my lips, lingering close to his, and was done talking for the moment. Maybe he did too, because he took a trembling breath and closed the distance.
It sent a bolt of lust through me, and I locked my arms around his neck. We kept it tentative at first, letting the electricity flow between us with each soft brush, but when he applied some pressure, I let my body take the wheel and threw myself into the kiss.
Gideon was absurdly good at kissing. He didn’t go too deep or too fast. I kissed him back