everything that had happened in Aunt Emmie’s conference room, I was feeling something I rarely experienced. Shy. Those stupid girls had tried to tempt Jagger with texted nudes for months, and he hadn’t even responded to a single one of them according to that Stacy girl. Knowing he hadn’t been hooking up with any of them despite them obviously being easy lays had given me a moment of power.
He didn’t want any of those girls who were beyond hot and begging him to fuck them.
Jagger Armstrong wanted me, and only me.
Showing them all that they meant nothing to him as we’d devoured each other’s mouths had made me feel like the most beautiful person in the universe. After the hell I’d been going through since Saturday night, it was a heady feeling to have my heart stop hurting nearly as much.
But then I saw Aunt Emmie and was reminded that things were still a total fuckshow. Reminded of what else had happened over the weekend, I’d felt my stomach bottom out, and the need to go home had started to claw at me, demanding I get back as soon as possible.
“I don’t plan on leaving as soon as we get to your place,” he said with a casual shrug as he switched lanes with ease. He glanced at me before quickly turning his gaze back to the heavy traffic surrounding us. “You going to tell me what’s going on? What were you and Ma talking about? Mieke, and even Rachel, seemed to know what’s up, but I’m in the dark here, Dimples.”
A lump filled my throat, and I wrapped my arms around myself as I fought a shiver. I wasn’t cold, but the thought of what I could have lost was still enough to make me shake.
“Shaw?” Jagger’s hand caught one of mine, and he entwined our fingers. “Baby, what has put that haunted look in those beautiful eyes? I don’t like it. Please, just tell me.”
Swallowing with difficulty, I blinked back the sudden sting of tears. “Sunday, Violet told her parents—” I broke off and clenched my eyes closed. “She told them she’s been having suicidal thoughts.”
I felt the car jerk, and my eyes snapped open as Jagger pulled off to the side of the road. His face was tight and pale now. I saw him gulp in a deep breath, and then he was unbuckling his seat belt. After undoing mine, he pulled me into his lap. He was shaking just as hard as I was, and he buried his face in my neck. “Is she okay? Did she try…?”
“No,” I choked out. “She’s okay, she didn’t hurt herself, but it kills me that she’s even having those kinds of thoughts. Violet is my favorite person in the world. She’s my sister. My soul. It hurts to even think about losing her for any reason, but to imagine her taking her own life…” A sob cut me off, and I clung to Jagger as I just let go for the first time since finding out how close I’d nearly come to losing my best friend.
I felt him kiss the top of my head as he held me. His shaking slowly subsided, and eventually my throat started to feel raw. As scared as I was of Violet’s dark thoughts, it was a relief to let go with Jagger. Let everything that had been building up go. It felt different from when I’d broken down with Mom Saturday night. This time, it was more powerful, more gut-wrenching. My entire body ached from the sobs, but he was there to hold me through it, keeping me together in case my body split apart from the agony of thinking about what could have happened.
“She’s going to be okay,” he murmured as he rocked me against him. “We’ll help her through this. Nothing will happen to Vi, baby. We’ll take care of her.”
“We?” I whispered, sniffling against him.
“Yeah, we.” He kissed my temple then used his thumb to lift my head so our gazes locked. “You and me.”
“Jags, I can’t be what you want. Not now.” I looked away, afraid to see the disappointment or anger in his eyes. Just because I needed him to hold me didn’t mean I’d stopped being scared. If anything, I was even more afraid. “Maybe not ever.”
My sweet, strong Violet was thinking about ending her life to get away from the pain of losing her soul mate. If that was what happened when a guy broke a