“Were you even going to tell me?” I whispered. “Or were you going to slip out as if you were never here?”
“You’re awake.” He tensed behind me.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“I… Fuck, I don’t know what to say.”
I turned in his arms, staring up at him. “You can’t even look at me, can you?”
“Fuck, Gattina, that’s not what this is.” His eyes glittered in the dark, darting around my face, but never fully meeting my eyes.
“So what is it? Because I’ve spent the last two days in hell, waiting for you to come to me… and you didn’t.”
“I tried…”
“But you couldn’t.” I let out a resigned sigh.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Gattina.”
“Yeah, me too.” The words shattered my heart. But it was only what I already knew.
Enzo had given up.
He was so lost to his own demons that he couldn’t see what was staring him in the eyes. I didn’t want to beg, I wouldn’t.
I had too much self-respect for that.
I wanted to be someone’s sun. The center of someone’s universe. Instead, I was a burden. And now I was tarnished.
Broken.
“I think you should leave,” my voice shook.
“Nora, please don’t do this.”
“I’ve given you everything.” Tears dripped down my cheeks. “But it still isn’t good enough…” I’m not good enough.
“It isn’t you, Gattina. You have to know that.” Enzo cupped my face, running his thumb along the line of my jaw. He touched me like I was fragile glass, about to shatter at any second.
The irony of the sentiment wasn’t lost on me.
“You are so fucking good, so fucking strong. You deserve someone who can protect you, someone who will keep you safe. I’m not that guy, Nora.” Regret clouded his eyes. “I don’t know how to be that guy.”
Try, I wanted to scream. Just try.
But I didn’t want Enzo to try for me, I wanted him to try because he wanted to.
Enzo wasn’t done though. He closed the distance between us, letting his mouth ghost over mine. “I’m going to go away for a while.”
“W-what?” Panic flooded my veins.
He nodded. “I think it’s best we get some distance. I need to deal with shit, and it’ll be easier on you if I’m not around all the time.”
“When will you leave?” He was ripping my heart out of my chest cavity and he was too blinded by anger to see it.
“As soon as Uncle Toni is home, which should be a couple of days.”
“I see.” Ice began freezing around my heart.
“For what it’s worth, I am sorry. The last thing I ever wanted was for you to get hurt. You deserve the world, Gattina, and one day, you’ll find someone worthy of you.”
Enzo sealed his mouth over mine, kissing me slow and deep, tracing the shape of my lips with his tongue. I kissed him back, imprinting the taste of him, the slight scratch of his stubble against my skin, the way his tongue expertly curled around my own. For as much as I hated him in this moment, I never wanted to forget him.
I never wanted to forget that for a small moment in time, Enzo Marchetti had been mine.
“Go,” tears trickled down my lips, “go, before I ask you to stay.” I kissed him harder, never wanting to let go.
But eventually I broke away, inhaling a ragged breath. “You know you can keep running from life, Enzo, but one day, you’re going to look back and realize you had everything, and you tossed it away, and you’ll have to live with that.”
He climbed out of bed and pulled on his clothes. Without another word, he went to the door, lingering for a second. In another life he would have declared his undying love for me.
In another life, he would have stayed.
But this wasn’t a fairy tale.
And Enzo wasn’t the hero.
It took me another four days until I finally left Nicco and Arianne’s guest room. My body had finally begun to heal, but my heart… that would take a while longer. You didn’t just forget about someone like Enzo. But Ari was right, I couldn’t let this—or him—break me.
So I showered, pulled on some clean clothes, and joined Nicco and Arianne for breakfast.
“This is a surprise,” my best friend said.
“I figured it’s time to enter the real world again.” My shoulders lifted in a small shrug.
“I’ll get you a plate.” Nicco got up.
“I think I’m going to start classes up on Monday.”