“Will you take me there?”
He paused. “Not tonight. But soon. Soon I will show you.”
“Why don’t you stay in the keep with the other vampires?”
“I avoid Hugo’s lair at all costs, and I’d have you do the same.”
“What goes on in there?” I needed to know the secret of that castle.
“Why the sudden interest?”
I couldn’t stop now. Carden and I were close. If he truly cared about me, he wouldn’t keep secrets. “If Emma was alive when they took her to the castle, what would’ve happened to her there?”
“This, I don’t know.” For once, he looked taken aback. This hadn’t been the direction he’d expected our little chat to take.
“You don’t know,” I repeated flatly. But there was something in his eyes. Something distracted that told me he might have some idea. “You must know something. If not about Emma, then how about the other girls. You know, the ones who disappear all the time. You’re a vampire. You say you’re not one of them—”
“I’m not one of Alcántara’s lackeys,” he interrupted with a growl.
“Fine. Still, you must have some clue.”
A heavy silence hung between us for a moment. “Your anger is misdirected. Trust me on this. Trust me, too, when I say I cannot tell you what occurs inside their keep.”
“So you do know.” Suddenly I was so tired. So sick of all these secrets. “Why won’t you tell me more?”
“For your own safety.” His answer was quick and sharp. “I know not what happened to your friend. Do I think she’s dead? Yes. Do I know of dark doings at Alcántara’s hand? Aye, this island is full of darkness. Would you have me secret you inside the castle, tour you around, introduce you to the one truth? I cannot, because there isn’t one. There is no lone truth, no single secret revelation. Will I tell you more than this? Can I risk telling you everything? Take the risk that Alcántara might one day perceive the knowledge in your eyes? Can I give him any suspicions of any kind? No, and no, and no again.”
“Sorry, Carden, but that’s just ridiculous. It’s dangerous enough just being here. Wouldn’t knowing the Directorate’s secrets be a good thing? Like, forewarned is forearmed?”
“There is some knowledge that is difficult even for me to bear. I would guard you against it. Against them.” He had such a pained look on his face as he said it, like he truly did want to protect me, from everything, even the bad thoughts. “If there was one truth to share that would help you, one thing I could say that would safeguard you, believe me, I would enlighten you. I wouldn’t hesitate; I would risk my existence to arm you with that knowledge. But there are only secrets and horrors in that castle, and I beg you to stay away.”
“Then why don’t you leave?”
“I’m bound to you,” he said with a quick smile. But then he paused and looked blindly into the distance. “Aye, we could flee this island together, but…other things hold me here. Other allegiances. Too dangerous for you,” he added before I could interrupt. “And there is no running from those. Some truths you cannot escape.”
I understood a little something about allegiances. And he was right. Alcántara and his cronies were powerful—there would be no disappearing where they were concerned, only death. “I guess we could run, but we’ll never be able to hide, huh?”
His eyes met mine again, and their light had returned once more. “Something like that.”
He was so old-fashioned. I believed he truly did earnestly wish to guard me. It made it hard to be angry. I studied him for a moment, my seventeenth-century sort-of boyfriend. “Protecting me from the bad guys—is that you being chivalrous?”
A grin threatened along the hard line of his mouth. I’d surprised him. “That is one word for it.”
I smiled then. “And I’d thought chivalry was dead.”
“You cannot blame me if I wish to keep you safe,” he said, growing serious again. “When I can.”
“You do realize I’ve done a pretty decent job of protecting myself, right?”
“Call it my weakness, but the need to defend you is strong.” Then he quickly added, “As you need it, of course.” His expression grew panicked, scrambling to express his true thoughts to the modern girl. “That is, if you allow it.”
His fear of making a conversational gaffe with me was the most endearing thing I’d ever seen. I leaned in to him, nudging him with my shoulder as we walked. “You’re such an antique.”
He laughed then, loudly, and his burst of good humor was irresistible. It broke the tension for good. “A man could do worse than to be your knight.”
It was full dark, and I looked up, studying his strong profile. The white moonlight etched a line along his jaw, and his smile seemed to glow in the darkness. He was all-powerful and yet he was there, with me, walking me back to my dorm, ever the gentleman, while he could’ve been…what? Ravaging helpless villagers? Drinking the blood of innocents? Who knew what they did in the keep. All I knew was that Carden McCloud wasn’t in there doing it with them.
So who was he really? I fantasized about taking down the Vampire Directorate, but maybe he did, too. “Why aren’t you like them?”