not having you stepping in front of me when you think someone’s attacking me.”
“Well too damn bad, Steele. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m in love with you. Love to me means protecting you along with taking all the things you give me. I can’t give you beautiful things, so I’ve given you me. All of me. That includes the way I love. Which is protective. I already admitted to you I was wrong and should have told you about Bridges. I was scared for you. And I was young, maybe too young to see you for who you really are. You were hiding yourself from everyone, including me.”
“Don’t you dare try to turn this on me and try to make me feel guilty.”
“I wasn’t doing that.” She took a step toward the dresser, moving at an angle away from him. Every step sent her breasts and ass swaying. “I was stating a fact. We’ve already talked this over, right? I don’t understand why the subject keeps coming up.”
“It keeps coming up because there was no resolution. If there had been, you wouldn’t have taken any chances in that motel with Lizard and Candy. But you couldn’t help yourself. You just had to try to make them believe I was dead. That Czar, the others and me were all killed in the massacre with the rest of the Swords who had been there. You did, didn’t you, Breezy, after we’d already had the discussion? I let it slide—”
“You let what slide? You didn’t let anything slide, we’re still talking about it. I got up in the middle of the night to check on our child and go to the bathroom. That’s normal, Steele, in case you aren’t aware of it. It isn’t a big sin and it isn’t being sneaky.”
“Don’t try to change what we’re talking about here.” He ran both hands through his hair in agitation. Where was all his calm? Where was his ability to stay in complete control? Breezy was destroying him bit by bit. Piece by piece.
“Steele”—Breezy clearly made every effort to sound calm—“I had my own father break into my home and kidnap my child. He was taken from me. I wake up scared and have to reassure myself that he’s here and he’s okay. You do the same thing, so don’t tell me you don’t. I see you. You don’t sleep for more than an hour anymore. I have trouble as well. It’s that simple, so stop blowing this out of proportion.”
She actually scowled, something he wouldn’t have thought her capable of. He’d never seen that particular expression and it scared him. She was really upset. She was most likely thinking of leaving him, and that wasn’t happening. He’d warned her. Straight up, he’d warned her.
“That’s bullshit, Bree. Total bullshit.” It was the absolute truth and he knew it. She had nightmares. He was worried enough that he’d put in a call to Blythe, asking her what he could do for his woman, yet he couldn’t stop himself even though he knew everything he said and did was wrong. There was so much pressure on his chest he could barely breathe through the pain.
Her hands went into the air as an exclamation point. “There’s no talking to you when you’re like this. You don’t even make sense. I have no idea what we’re doing. How this even got started.”
Breezy turned toward the door and he was on her, catching her up in hard arms, all but tossing her onto the bed, that monster in him surging to the surface, threatening to swallow him. “You fucking don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to you.”
She lay there, her eyes wide, but there was no real fear on her face. There should be. He wanted her to be afraid so she’d never walk out on him. The anger receded from her eyes and then there was only his woman looking at him. Compassionate. Knowledgeable. Seeing too much. He wanted to hide from any truth she might see. It was too dangerous. Too terrible. His heart felt as if it might explode. Sweat trickled down his body. Beads of it. He was fucked. So fucked because she saw too much every time.
“Baby.” She paused, her hand cupping the side of his jaw gently. “You have to tell me what’s wrong. What’s really wrong. Whatever it is, I need to know. I can’t say I can help you, but I want to and maybe sharing with me