amount of power.”
I’m still suspicious. “Then why have you never visited before?”
“Lonnrach put wards up that made it difficult to track you, and they take time to dismantle. My sister is still working through the one that leads to this room.” He gestures to himself. “She was able to lift it just enough for this form to pass through while she finishes. Satisfied?”
If I allow myself to believe him . . . no. I can’t. Lonnrach has been in my mind. I’ve taken his food. He can make me see whatever he wants. “No. I don’t believe you.”
“Your stubbornness is commendable, truly,” Kiaran says dryly. “I’m grateful you still have it.”
“See? That’s how I know you’re Lonnrach’s creation.” I wag my finger at him. “Kiaran always hated my stubbornness.”
“Honestly, at the moment I’m having a hard time not mistaking it for stupidity.”
I glare at him. “As a figment of my imagination, I demand you stop insulting me.” I press my fingernails into the grooves of the bite-marks again and shut my eyes. “And go away.”
He’s quiet for so long, I swear he must have gone. I refuse to open my eyes to find out.
“Kam.” This time when Kiaran says my name, I hear the hint of emotion there barely contained.
When I open my eyes, he’s staring down at me—no, not at me. At where my fingernails are embedded. The sleeve of my shift has slipped back to reveal the length of my forearm. I watch as he takes in my new scars, my scabbing marks, up to my neck, where a dozen more are puckered and healed over. The latest one, just above my collarbone, is still bleeding.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen his expression so cold and brutal. Not like this. Lonnrach could never have pulled that from my memories. This is really Kiaran. Kiaran. He didn’t abandon me. He’s here for me.
Kiaran kneels by my side. This time when he reaches for me, his touch is solid. I’m startled by it. It’s been daysweeksmonthsyears since I’ve been touched by someone other than Lonnrach and I almost forgot how gentleness felt. I don’t pull away. Not even when he wraps his fingers around my wrist to draw my arm closer.
I’m embarrassed by the marks. Now he knows I stopped fighting. That I didn’t resist anymore. “He wanted . . . he—”
“I know what he wanted.” Kiaran’s voice is rough, tinged with anger. He traces my scars with his thumb, as if memorizing the pattern. “I’ll kill him for giving you these.”
“No,” I say, a bit forcefully. Kiaran looks at me, surprised. “It’ll be me. It has to be me.”
I will him to understand. Lonnrach could have broken me. He practically did. All I had left were my memories, my feelings, and once I lost those—I would have been his. It has to be me.
“Very well,” Kiaran says simply.
That’s not good enough. “Promise.”
Kiaran strokes my wrist with his thumb—once, twice, three times. Stopping when he reaches the part where several marks overlap. “On one condition.” He holds my gaze. “You let me be the one who supplies the blade.”
“Aye,” I whisper.
He understands. We’ve hunted together. We’ve lost a battle together. That’s a bond that lasts a lifetime.
Kiaran nods. “Let’s get you out of here.”
I’d imagined those words a thousand times, picturing myself strong and capable again. In my imagination, I stand without difficulty. The truth is, when Kiaran helps me to my feet, my vision sways from the blood loss and lingering venom of Lonnrach’s bite. My knees almost immediately buckle.
Kiaran grasps my shoulders—or tries to. His hands go right through me and I just barely manage to catch myself.
“Listen to me.” His voice muffles slightly, as though he’s speaking across a great distance. “This mirror”—he indicates the nearest one—“will lead you to my sister. The ward that was preventing you from leaving should be down by now.”
“You’re not coming?” I try to keep the emotion out of my voice. I just got Kiaran back. I can’t lose him again.
“I can’t keep this form for long.” He’s already fading, his body blurring around the edges.
“Wait! Don’t—”
With his last bit of strength, Kiaran cups my cheek. His fingers are warm, so warm. “I’ll be waiting for you on the other side.”
CHAPTER 5
ONCE THROUGH the mirror, I blink hard against the sudden onslaught of natural light. My vision clears and I’m surprised to find myself on the edge of a platform that looks across the Sìth-bhrùth’s crevasse. The other floating platforms are