her go back to New York to a place her father still controlled.
Dawson and I were quiet on the way back to the Victorian.
I could hear his wheels turning, blaming himself, trying to distance himself from me, but I would be damned if I’d let this come between us. I wasn’t a sixteen-year-old girl who was going to let him take the heat for driving us off a cliff. We were all adults who’d known what we were doing each step of the way.
Or at least, I had once they’d told me the truth. I could have backed away then, and I hadn’t. I didn’t want to. They were my friends. People I cared about. People I loved. I would always support them.
Tami was in the kitchen when we entered. She looked at our appearance, me in scrubs, Dawson in a shirt with hints of blood, and her mouth fell open. The shootout had made the local news, and I was surprised that we hadn’t heard from more of our family.
“Are you okay?” she asked, hustling forward.
“We are. It isn’t either of our blood. Jada was hurt,” I told her, swallowing as the reality hit me all over again. Jada almost died in the ambulance.
“Is she going to be okay?” Tami asked.
I nodded, and Dawson remained silent as he grabbed a couple of water bottles from the refrigerator.
“You both look exhausted. Go get some rest. Saul and I have this covered,” she said, referring to the guests and the list of daily activities that needed to be done.
“Thank you for staying,” I said. “I’m sorry you’ve had to help so much lately.”
“Stop. It’s our job. And Mandy and Leena are family. This is what family does. We’re here when we’re needed.” Her words lingered in the air. Family. I was hoping Dawson was paying attention.
Dawson grabbed my hand, and I saw Tami’s eyes widen at the joining of our fingers. I was pretty sure Mandy and Leena would be hearing about it. She smirked and made a shooing motion.
Dawson tugged me from the room. We mounted the stairs, heading in the direction of my room instead of his. When we got there, he fell onto the bed on his back, pulling me with him. I curled up next to him with my hand landing on his chest.
“I have probably two hours max before Malone calls me in for a debriefing,” he said.
“Then you should sleep,” I said. “But I want you to know, I meant what I said at the hospital. I’m proud of you.”
He turned his head so his eyes met mine.
“Vi, I managed to singlehandedly screw up a four-year operation, almost got Jada killed, and put you at risk. There is nothing to be proud of.” His voice was gruff, full of the self-recrimination he and Jada were both so good at, beating themselves up over things they couldn’t control.
“Do you think I should hate myself because my dad killed Ana Perez?” I asked.
His eyes widened in shock. “What? Hell no! That was all on him. He got behind the wheel of a car while drunk and almost killed you in the process. You’ve had to live with the repercussions of that every day since then. No way should you feel guilty.”
“Isn’t it the same then? Jada’s dad and the Kyōdaina are the reason all of this happened, not you.”
He ran a finger over my cheek. “My job was to end it.”
I pushed my hair behind me and tried not to roll my eyes. “Yeah, because disbanding an international crime syndicate is so easy. That’s why the Mexican cartels and the Yakuza and all the other major players are taken out of business with one major crackdown, right?”
He stared at me for a moment and then started chuckling. The chuckling turned into full-on laughter, his chest and belly heaving with the force of it. The deep tones washed over me, and I couldn’t help smiling with him even though I wasn’t quite sure why we were laughing. The long hours and exhaustion were making us delirious.
“Leave it to my little genius to point out all the flaws in my logic. Where was your matter-of-fact statement when Malone and I had big ideas of toppling it from the head of the snake all the way down?” He grinned at me, admiration in his voice.
“What can I say? I’m new to the whole Dawson-is-a-secret-agent thing. Otherwise, I could have given you a mouthful.”