Because when he explodes, it sure as fuck won't be pretty.
As we say goodbye for the night, a different scenario from the one they're describing plays out in my head. And I know things will finish my way, not theirs.
I watch them leave before getting into my cab, my twin brother's arm protectively draped around my girl's shoulders. And I tell myself it won't be for long. Only a little while left before I claim what's always been mine.
30
June
Kade wants another baby.
He has made that abundantly clear, at first just hinting at the fact, but becoming more and more obvious with each day that passes. And finally, after we get back from dinner with his twin that night, he says it out loud.
"Wouldn't it be wonderful if Theo had a sibling to play with?" I busy myself with pouring a tall glass of water and gulping the liquid down in long, thirsty gulps. When I'm done, I set the glass on the marble counter, still avoiding Kade's gaze. "Well, Junebug? You can't avoid the topic forever."
"I know," I mutter. The truth is, I've always wanted a big family. To have kids running around the house has been a dream for me since I was a little girl. But now... now everything's different.
Kade can see he's upset me with his words, and we go to bed that night without speaking about it again. The distance between us in our bed has never felt bigger, and as I twist the duvet in my hands, I wonder whether my stepbrother will ever give up on his dream of having another baby. I just don't know if I'm ready... If I can bring another baby into the world.
With Parker—Nox—back in our lives, I'm struggling to keep my mind on things such as our growing family. I want Parker involved in our lives. I'm hoping he's learned his lesson since the last time we were close, but the doubt is still there, ever-present in the back of my mind. He tried to hurt me... Who says he wouldn't go after Kade's and my kids, too?
In his sleep, Kade pulls me closer until my body is tight against his. I can feel his hardness through his pajama bottoms, always ready for me, wanting me. At least that aspect of our lives hasn’t changed, and I’m thankful every day for choosing the right brother. It's always been Kade, and Parker could never stand it. Settling into the crook of my husband’s arms, I close my eyes firmly and tell myself to go to sleep, but it’s a vain effort. Dark thoughts keep penetrating, and I can’t seem to get a wink of sleep. The nightmares that plagued me as a little girl are back with a vengeance.
I lie next to Kade for hours, until it’s finally an acceptable hour of the morning to get up. Nuzzling into his side, he groans when he feels me moving.
“Good morning. Sleep well, Junebug?” he asks me, and it’s my time to groan as I bury my face in his neck. I love the way he smells—all musk and something sweet, like vanilla and mint. It drives me crazy, even after all this time. Kade takes my face in his hands, flipping me until I’m on top of his body, straddling him. His eyes are sleepy but mischievous nonetheless, and my gaze replicates his.
“I want you,” he groans, guiding my hand over his boxer shorts, where his cock is begging to be set free and played with. I tease him, running my hand over his shorts until he groans my name over and over again. Finally, he has enough of me and slips my hand into his boxers himself.
My fingers wrap around the thick head of his cock, the skin velvety smooth in my hand. I moan when I feel the drop of pre-cum already on his cock, the bead wet under my fingers. I pull my hand out of his boxers and bring my index finger to my lips, giving it a long, delicious lick. I’ve come a long way since I was the sweet little girl whose innocence was taken away by her stepbrother…
The moment I lick his cum from my finger is the second he comes undone. With a low growl emanating from deep in his throat, he flips me on my back and rips my panties off to put my pulsating sex on full display. Already panting, he licks a finger fervently and pushes it inside me