I choked back a sob. “Ren, I . . . I missed you so much. I wanted to talk to you. You’re my best friend. It’s just that I didn’t want to take away your choices. Can you understand that?”
My arms were still wrapped tightly around his neck when I felt him change. His body morphed and soon his arms were around me and I was sitting on his lap. His white shirt was damp from my tears.
Hugging me close, he said, “I missed you too, iadala. More than you know. And I understand your reasons for leaving.”
I mumbled against his shirt, “You do?”
“Yes. But I want you to understand something too, Kells. You don’t take away my choices. You are my choice.”
I sniffed wetly. “But, Ren—”
He pulled my head back to his shoulder. “This man, Li. You kissed him?”
I nodded mutely against his chest. There was no point denying it. I knew he must have heard it through the door.
“Do you love him?”
“I feel friendship and respect for him, and I like him a lot, but I’m definitely not head over heels about him.
“Then why did you kiss him?”
“I kissed him to . . . compare, I guess. To explore how I really felt about him.”
Ren picked me up and set me on the couch next to him. He was warming to the topic, and I couldn’t figure out why. I expected him to be angry, but he wasn’t at all.
“So dating is how you learn if you like each other?”
“Yes,” I answered hesitantly.
“Did you have other dates or is this the first one?”
“You mean with Li?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Were there others?”
“Yes.” I frowned.
“How many?”
“Three altogether—Li, Jason, and Artie. If you can count Artie. Ren, why all the questions? What are you getting at?”
“I’m just curious about modern courtship rituals. What did you do on these dates?”
“I’ve been out to see a couple of movies, I went out to dinner, I went with Li to a wedding, and I saw a football game with Jason.”
“Did you kiss all these men?”
“No! I’ve only kissed Li, and this was the first time.”
“So Li is the one you favor.” Ren started mumbling to himself. Turning to face me, he took my hands in his. “Kelsey, I think you should keep dating.”
My mouth dropped open. “What?”
“I’m serious. I’ve been thinking about it while you were gone. You talked about giving me choices. I’ve made mine, but you still haven’t made yours.”
“Ren, this is crazy! What are you talking about?”
“Date Li or Jason or whoever you want to, and I promise I won’t interfere. But I also want a fair chance. I want you to date me too.”
“I don’t think you understand how dating works, Ren. I can’t just date three or four men forever. The point of dating is that you end up becoming exclusive with someone you hit it off with.”
He shook his head. “You date to find the person you love, Kelsey.”
I sputtered, “So what am I supposed to tell Li, ‘By the way, Ren is back, and he thought it would be great if I dated you both?’”
He shrugged. “If Li can’t handle a little honest competition, then it’s better for you to know that now.”
“That’s going to make attending wushu class very awkward.”
“Why?”
“He’s my teacher.”
Ren grinned. “Good. I’ll tag along. I want to meet him and I could use a good workout anyway.”
“Uh, Ren, it’s a beginner’s class. You don’t belong, and I don’t want you fighting with Li. I’d really rather you didn’t go.”
“I’ll be a perfect gentleman.” He tilted his head, considering me. “Are you afraid that I’d be the obvious choice?”
“No,” I replied testily. “I’m more afraid you’d squash him like a bug!”
“I wouldn’t do that, Kelsey. Presuming I wanted to, that wouldn’t be the way to win your affections. Even I know that. So will you date me?”
“Dating you would be . . . hard.”
“Why is it easier to date other men than me? And don’t give me the radish explanation again. It’s ridiculous.”
“Because,” I continued quietly, “if it didn’t work out, I could survive without those other men.”
Kissing my fingers, Ren looked intently into my eyes and said, “Iadala, you will never lose me. I’ll always be near you. Give me a chance, Kells. Please.”
I sighed and looked at his beautiful face. “Okay. We’ll try it.”
“Thank you.” He leaned back against the sofa very pleased with himself. “Just treat me like all the other guys.”