room, a fragility shaking her body that told him she was at the edge of a breaking point.
“How did you survive the pain?” he finally asked.
“I withdrew. Went inside myself to a place where I didn’t have to face it or worry. I tried to come back for Zoe, and my family. But it was too easy to stay. I went to the hospital for a while, Gabe. They termed it a breakdown.”
“But you came back.”
“Yes. One day, Avery came to visit me, and she had Zoe. I held my sweet little girl, and I heard her crying. It was as if she was asking me to come back. After they left the hospital, I tried harder, and things became less fuzzy. Then I heard Matt’s voice.”
A chill leaked through him. “What did he say?”
“He said it was time to go back to my life. To be with Zoe. To be strong.” Her voice grew faint. “I always listened to Matt, you know. He was really smart and had my best interests in mind. So I fought harder and got out of the hospital. Began therapy. Got better.” She swayed on her feet, and her eyes took on a glassy sheen. “Do you think I’ll always have something broken in me?”
Shock waves of emotion hit him full force. He didn’t think, just moved.
In seconds, he’d crossed the room and swept her up in his arms, carrying her gently back to the sofa. Pulling her tight, he held her against his chest and rocked her like a child, stroking her hair, murmuring her name. She was stiff at first, then, inch by inch, her body folded in, and she let go. The sobs came later—huge, racking, horrible sounds from the depths of her, trapped for so long they exploded out. He was humbled by the force of her love, horribly jealous of Matt to have claimed her in a way that would transcend a lifetime, and fiercely determined to show her how damn strong she really was.
Finally, the sobs eased. He kept her close, tucking her head against his chest, offering her a physical comfort he knew she desperately needed. “Life breaks everyone at one point. But the survivors get up and keep going, even if they’re a bit broken. That’s the type of strength you have,” he said quietly. “You’ll love and miss him till the day you die. But you didn’t give up. You fought back to give Zoe a mom, and flourished in a career that fosters happiness and love. Terming it as weakness insults both you and Matt. Don’t do that, Bella.”
She raised her head. Tears streaked her cheeks. Her lipstick was rubbed off. Her hair was a wild thing of curls and waves that exploded around her. But it was her eyes that stole his soul, those powder-blue eyes that stared right back at him with a surge of heat and life that made him desperate to lower his head and kiss her deep and long and hard until they burned like fire and melted into each other as one.
His muscles locked in an effort to remain still. She needed something else from him right now—something bigger than the physical—and he intended to give it to her.
“I could never cry on this day,” she said. “I didn’t realize by refusing to feel anything, I’d made the pain stronger. And you’re right. Matt would have hated me calling myself weak.”
He caressed her cheek, treasuring the silky feel of her skin. “Good, then we’re in agreement.”
Slowly, she lay back in his arms. He leaned back and shifted her slightly to the side so her cheek rested against his chest. He stroked her back, and they sat in silence for a long time. He knew it wouldn’t change anything between them, but he savored the moment of closeness, happy to be the man who was able to quiet her demons for a while.
When Bella finally extricated herself from his embrace, she expected to feel ashamed. Instead, there was a new lightness inside her that hadn’t been there before. As if she’d been carrying rocks and had finally let them drop.
He immediately eased away, got up, and came back with tissues. She wiped her face, blew her nose, and let out a breath. “Thank you.”
“There’s nothing to thank me for. You’re hard on yourself.”
She gave a half laugh. “Aren’t we all?”
“I guess we are. Just remember you’re an extraordinary woman.” He paused. “I wish you could see yourself the way