T-Bone - L. Wilder Page 0,63

it yourself that being with me was going to make things complicated.”

“But that didn’t stop me. Complicated as it was, I fell for you anyway.”

I knew he cared for me, but until that moment, he’d never actually said the words out loud. I felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest, making me wonder if I was making a terrible mistake. I loved him. There was no doubt about that, but it wasn’t that simple. There were things about him that he’d kept hidden from me, and now that I knew the truth, I wasn’t sure how I felt anymore. “I don’t want to hurt you. That’s not my intention, especially after all you’ve done for me, but I just can’t do this anymore.”

“So, that’s it. Just like that. We’re done.”

“Yeah, I think it’s for the best.”

“For you or for me?” His eyes dropped to the ground as he declared, “’Cause I can tell you now, it sure isn’t the best thing for me.”

“It is. You’ll see that in time.”

“Been around the block enough times to know you’re wrong about that, freckles.” He leaned forward, kissed me on the forehead, then said, “I’ll respect your wishes. I won’t come around anymore, but if you ever need me, I’m just a phone call away.”

Biting back my tears, I watched him walk down my front steps and get on his bike. I had to fight every fiber of my being to keep myself from calling out and begging him to stay, knowing I had to let him go. I couldn’t bear to watch him ride away, so I rushed inside and closed the door behind me, then ran to my room and lay across the bed. As the tears streamed down my face, I thought back to something my mother once told me—“There are three things you should never break: promises, trust, or someone’s heart.” Tonight, I’d broken all three.

15

T-Bone

I left Alyssa’s place feeling completely defeated. I tried to get her to talk to me, to tell me what was going on in her head, but she refused. She’d had it set in her head that it was done, and there was no changing her mind. Needless to say, it didn’t set well with me. In fact, it hurt like hell. It was like my fucking ribs were broken. I could barely breathe, and no one could see the pain I was feeling. The hardest part was forcing myself to let go of the dream of what could’ve been. As crazy as it sounds, I thought we actually had something. I sure as hell hadn’t felt anything close to how I did when I was with her. Like she said, “It is what it is.” I had no one else to blame. I’d let myself fall for a woman I knew I could never have, and I would have to face the consequences—starting with Hyde.

It was after eleven when I got back to the clubhouse, so I was surprised to find Hyde standing by the back door smoking a cigarette. I would’ve thought he’d be inside with Landry, so once I was parked, I walked over to him and asked, “Everything okay?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing.” He took a drag off his cigarette, then tossed it to the ground, snubbing it out with his boot. “I went over to Alyssa’s place tonight. I was gonna talk to her again about coming here for the lockdown, but to my surprise, I found you there, and I gotta tell ya, you both seemed right cozy standing up there on her porch. So, I’m wondering ... were you ever planning on telling me about what’s going on between you two?”

“Yeah, actually, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that for a while now, but with everything that’s been going on with Gus, I haven’t had the chance.”

“Oh, is that right?” He shook his head with a huff. “Well, I’m here now. Let’s talk about it.”

“I should’ve come to you sooner. I get that, but honestly, even I wasn’t sure what was going on with us.” I shrugged. “I went over there a couple of times to check on her after she’d seen that Brant asshole, and it just kind of slipped up on me. I figured it was just me who was getting caught up in it, but I guess a part of her did too.”

“So, this has been going on since the night she saw Lucas in