I bit my lower lip, my heart twisting in my chest. He had to be feeling the same unsettling rift between us that was troubling me. “We are. Don’t you think so? Is something wrong?”
“No.” He paused. “I just had to hear it again.”
“I didn’t make it clear last night?” When I was clawing at your back … “Or this morning?” When I was on my knees …
“I needed to hear you say it when you’re not looking at me.” Gideon’s voice caressed my senses. I turned hot with embarrassment.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, feeling awkward. “I know you get annoyed with women objectifying you. You shouldn’t have to put up with it from me.”
“I would never complain about being what you want, Eva. Christ.” His voice turned gruff. “I’m damned glad you like what you see, because God knows I f**king love looking at you.”
I closed my eyes against a surge of longing. To know what I did now—how important he thought I was to him—made it so much harder to stay away. “I miss you so much. And it’s weird because everyone thinks we’re broken up and I need to move on—”
“No!” The one word exploded across the line between us, sharp enough to make me jump. “Goddamn it. Wait for me, Eva. I waited my whole life for you.”
I swallowed hard, opening my eyes in time to see Will walking toward me. I lowered my voice. “I’d wait forever for you, as long as you’re mine.”
“It won’t be forever. I’m doing everything I can. Trust me.”
“I do.”
In the background, another phone beeped for his attention. “I’ll see you at eight sharp,” Gideon said briskly.
“Yes.”
The line clicked off in my ear, and I instantly felt lonely.
“Ready to chow down?” Will asked, rubbing his hands together with anticipation. Megumi was having lunch with her commitment-phobe, so she’d taken a rain check. It was Will, me, and all the pasta he could eat within an hour.
Thinking a carbohydrate-induced stupor might be just what I needed, I stood and said, “Hell yeah.”
I picked up a zero-carb energy drink at a Duane Reade drugstore on the way back from lunch. By the time five o’clock rolled around, I knew I was hitting a treadmill after work.
I had a membership at Equinox, but I really wanted to go to a CrossTrainer gym. I was feeling the gulf between Gideon and me keenly. Spending time in a place where we had good memories would help lessen it. Plus, I felt a sense of loyalty. Gideon was my man. I was going to do everything I could to spend the rest of my life with him. To me that meant supporting him in everything he did.
I walked back to my place, no longer caring if I wilted since I was going to get messy at the gym anyway. When the elevator in my apartment building let me out on my floor, I found my gaze drifting to the door next to mine. My fingers toyed with the key Gideon had given me. The idea of letting myself in to check out his apartment was intriguing. Would it be similar to his Fifth Avenue place? Or totally different?
Gideon’s penthouse was stunning, with prewar architecture and old-world charm. It was a space that exuded affluence, while still remaining warm and inviting. I could as easily picture children in the space as I could foreign dignitaries.
What would his temporary digs be like? Scarce furniture, nonexistent art, and a bare kitchen? How settled in was he?
Pausing outside my apartment, I stared at his door and debated with myself. In the end, I resisted the temptation. I wanted him to walk me inside.
I stepped into my living room to the sound of female laughter. I wasn’t surprised to find a long-legged blonde curled up next to Cary on my white couch, her hand in his lap, stroking him through his sweats. He was still shirtless, his arm tossed around Tatiana Cherlin’s shoulders, his fingers idly stroking her biceps.
“Hey, baby girl,” he greeted me with a grin. “How was work?”
“Same old. Hi, Tatiana.”
Her reply was a chin jerk. She was striking, which was to be expected since she was a model. Looks aside, I hadn’t really liked her all that much the first few times I met her, and I still didn’t. But looking at Cary, I had to admit she might be good for him for now.
His bruises were gone, but he was still recovering from a brutal beating, an ambush by Nathan that had set in motion the events separating me from Gideon now.
“I’m going to change and head out to the gym,” I said, moving toward the hallway.
Behind me, I heard Cary tell Tatiana, “Hang on a sec, I’ve got to talk to my girl.”
I entered my room and tossed my purse on my bed. I was digging in my dresser when Cary came to lounge in my doorway. “How are you feeling?” I asked him.