bring reinforcements.
Kipa joined me in the kitchen when I went to replenish my soda. Ferosyn had forbade alcohol for either Raven or me until we were better, and so it was a dry Beltane. I didn’t feel like drinking booze, anyway, and though we were all laughing and joking, there was an undercurrent of tension running through the room.
“Ember, can I talk to you about something?” Kipa asked.
I glanced up at him. “Of course. What’s going on?”
“It’s about Raven. I’m worried.”
I nodded. “I know, but I doubt Pandora will target her again. She’ll be gunning for all of us, especially Merlin, since he’s the one who blew her socks off back on the mountain. And unlike Morgana, he’s capable of being killed.”
“That’s not what’s worrying me,” Kipa said. “It’s… She’s different. She says she’s fine, but I know she’s not. She gets angry at me when I tell her to take it easy. She lashes out when I’m just trying to help her. I know I can be obtuse at times, but I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m trying not to hover, but I’m getting paranoid.” He leaned against the counter.
“Ferosyn was afraid this might happen,” I said. “He offered her a chance to meet with a therapist, but she refused. I think it’s due to the lack of control she had in the situation. And also, Pandora hooked her in. Raven didn’t have a clue she was talking to Pandora, and I think she’s angry at herself. I think she blames herself for putting us all in danger.” I paused. “Have you thought of talking to her mother? Phasmoria is pretty imposing. She might be able to take Raven in hand and help her.”
“I’m afraid if I did that, Raven would never speak to me again. But it may be a chance I’ll have to take. I know that I have to do something, because she’s starting to act out. She didn’t come home until four a.m. the other morning and when I asked her where she was, she wouldn’t tell me. I know she’s been hanging out with Trinity, and regardless of the fact that he helped us out, I just don’t like the guy.”
I could hear the catch in his voice. I rested my hand on his arm. “I know, Kipa. I know. I don’t care for him myself. Give Raven some time. I’ll talk to her and see if it helps.”
As we rejoined the others, I couldn’t help but wonder, though, how much Pandora had changed us all. Because I knew I had changed. And I knew without Raven telling me that she was desperate to regain control of her life, and Pandora’s torture loomed like a gaping reminder that almost all control was merely an illusion to help us make it through the days.
I started to help Angel clear up after Kipa and Raven went home, but Rafé took the stack of dishes from me and shooed me out of the kitchen. Herne swept me up in his arms and carried me up to the bedroom, with Mr. Rumblebutt racing along behind us.
As I curled up on my bed, I asked Herne to prop open the window. The warm evening breeze sailed through, but I could feel the promise of rain in the air, and I welcomed the prospect of wet streets and cloud-swept spring skies.
“Tomorrow’s Beltane,” I said.
“My birthday,” Herne answered, lying back with his hands beneath his head. “I got a call from Viktor. Sheila’s out of the hospital but she’s scared to go back to work. She’s moving in with him. I think it’s a good thing. Oh, and Rafé has agreed to join the Wild Hunt as a clerk.” He yawned and reached out to take my hand, carefully avoiding my wrists.
I took Herne’s fingers, bringing them to my lips and kissing them. I wanted him, wanted all of him, but I wasn’t sure if it was because I was horny or because I wanted some sort of desperate reassurance that things would be all right. He scooched up against the headboard and I rested my head on his shoulder.
“It’s been a year since Angel and I came to work for the Wild Hunt,” I said. “I’ve decided to get another tattoo. I have an appointment for tomorrow morning. What better time to get it than on Beltane?”
Herne glanced at me. “Really? What are you getting?”
“A crow, with outstretched wings. Your mother was right. I have to give in to my