I was holed up in heaven with a double whammy of gorgeousness, how they were sending me crazy, making me giddy, making me feel so alive.
But no. What kind of girl dumps a confession like that to their mother?
“Samson,” I said, finally. “I’m just worried how all this will affect my time with my baby.”
“Samson will still be there in six months,” she said. “Samson will be just fine, waiting. He’s had all of you, Katie, for long enough. It’s time.”
I was missing him so much it hurt my tummy, desperate to mount up and canter through the woods until my soul soared, but by the same token I really didn’t want to leave the guys. Especially not when Carl opened up a bottle of champagne and handed me a flute.
“To new opportunities,” he said, and we toasted. “You’ve a fair amount of prep work to catch up on, but I can help. We can work through the technical slides over the evenings. Come Monday you’ll be as geared to start live calling as the rest of them. An even playing field.”
And then I hit him with it, the topic I’d let slide all day.
“What did Verity want with you?” I focused my eyes straight on his. “I saw you leave the room with her.”
He shrugged. “Verity is always wanting something. She’s a complainer.”
“She doesn’t want me there, does she?”
He took my shoulders and squeezed, stared down at me with smouldering eyes that turned my legs to jelly. “It doesn’t matter what Verity wants, Katie. Not to me.”
“That’s refreshing. The whole world normally revolves around what Princess Verity wants.”
“An even playing field, like I said.” And there was meaning in the words he left unsaid, his tone heavy and lingering.
An even playing field. The same starting point, she and I. Both of us with our toes on the same line, competing on the same track, and this time there’d be no fancy outfits that would give Verity the upper hand, no special coaches in the wings to up her game and set her out of my league.
No special treatment. No biased scholarships. No wad of cash set to raise her to a higher platform.
Just us, like for like, waiting for the bell to ring. Round one!
My brain raced through the times I’d felt inferior and she’d revelled in it. The posh birthday parties, just for her, even though her birthday was just five days before mine, where I’d been the poor girl, the useless half-sister, the odd one out. How she’d laughed at me with her friends until I’d cried all night to Mum.
Look at my ponies, Katie. All of them, all mine. You don’t have a pony, do you?
Look at my dolls, Katie. All of them, all mine. You don’t have dolls like mine, do you?
Look at my daddy, Katie. He loves me, not you. Why are you even here, Katie? Nobody likes you here. Nobody wants you here.
Just go home to your own mum, Katie, where you belong.
I hate you, Katie. You’re not my sister. You’re nobody. Just an ugly girl without a proper daddy.
I’d struggled to pay for one horse, she’d had ten. I’d begged and bargained to get lifts to local eventing circuits with Samson, she’d had a tailor-made horse wagon with sleeping quarters. I’d taken two jobs to support me through a business degree from Worcester University, she’d waltzed through Oxford without the burden of tuition fees, taking International Business, French and Latin with extra time coaching.
I learned to sew to repair tired items in my wardrobe to extend their usefulness, she’d had a whole new wardrobe every season. Every fucking season.
But now, for the first time, we were matched. Even.
None of it mattered, not really. I’d learned to accept it and take pride in my own accomplishments a long time ago, but this… this, promise felt warm in my belly.
The promise of fair treatment. The prospect of taking on Verity without all the fanfare and the glamour and the hype that usually follows her around.
Maybe, just maybe, I could go up against Princess Verity Faverley on an even playing field and win.
I could win.
And maybe I wanted to. The feeling felt alien, cold and scaly but surprisingly compelling.
“What are you thinking?” Carl said, and he was still staring at me, his eyes eating me up.
I put my champagne on the side. “Let’s start on those technical slides,” I said.
I soaked it all in, everything he told me. Went over the slides again and again