leaned against a mirror, checking out flouncy accessories, and I just stood, like an idiot, my arms folded over the stupid slogan on my chest.
That smiley woman was staring at me, her eyes slightly squinty. “Thirty-four, twenty-six, thirty-six?”
“Thirty-six, twenty-six, thirty-eight.”
“Thirty-eight, right.” She walked around me. “Horse riding?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“Always leads to a generous rump,” she laughed. “It’s good,” she added. “Gives shape.”
She didn’t have a generous rump, and it was clear she didn’t want one.
She beckoned me through to a changing room, and Carl and Rick tagged behind, Carl with an armful of clothes of his own choosing. He made me take them.
I pulled the curtain closed behind me and stripped down. My pale flesh was luminous under the changing room lights, and I felt vulnerable, naked. Inferior.
I could just imagine Verity shopping here on Daddy’s gold card, laughing with the assistants like they were long lost buddies.
I started dressing with a sigh, expecting to hate every moment, expecting to see a stupid pasty fraud staring back at me from the mirror, a silly girl who didn’t belong here.
But I didn’t.
The clothes I tried on fitted perfectly, hugging me in all the right places. The blouse fastened perfectly over my tits without gaping, and nipped in at the waist to accentuate my curves. The pencil skirt rested just above my knees, hugging tight to my thighs without being slutty, and the jacket. The jacket was wonderful. A little height in the shoulders, but not too much. A smooth flare over my hips. Jet black with the tiniest satin trim around the lapels, and I was in love.
I stepped out from behind the curtain.
“Whoa,” Rick said. “Hey, sexy lady.”
But it was Carl who looked the most impressed. His eyes didn’t stop moving, up and down, from my eyes to my toes and back again. “Yes,” he said. “More of that. That’s perfect.” He stepped forward and ran his fingers down my sleeve. “You look perfect.”
I look perfect.
I was prickling under my suit, my heart pounding, but I wasn’t nervous anymore. My shoulders were high and my smile was genuine, and I knew I could do this, any of this.
“I’ll try the rest,” I said.
I tried not to think about the bags in the back, or the figure missing from Carl’s bank account. It made me a little queasy.
“I’ll pay you back,” I said for the tenth time. “I have money, now.”
“No,” he said. “You won’t.”
I’ll pay you in kind, then. The prospect made my pussy clench, and I was still aching there.
It thrilled me that I could still feel where they’d been, as though they’d marked me somehow. Made me theirs.
“Can you stay?” Rick said. “Go with Carl to work in the morning? Makes sense, doesn’t it?”
I thought about my case full of clothes, slung in the passenger seat of my old rust bucket. Of my lack of toothbrush, and hair products. But mainly I thought of Samson.
Jack could take care of him, just for one more night. The weather was good enough for outdoors, and Samson would like that. He’d definitely like that. I could ask Jack the question, at least.
I sent off a text message and the reality of my situation came pouring in. Nine to five in Cheltenham. How would I fit in any riding? How would I fit in my waitressing evenings? How would I work my notice period with Benny?
“If you don’t like the clothes, we can take them back, try another boutique tomorrow,” Carl said, and I realised I was scowling.
“No,” I said. “It’s not that.”
“What, then?”
“Just… logistics,” I said. “I wasn’t expecting a job when I walked into that office this afternoon. I have… commitments.”
“Samson?”
“And work, and life, and things.”
He shrugged. “We’ll make it work, the stuff that matters.”
We will? I hoped so.
I did what I had to do. I made the calls, I explained the opportunity, letting down the people who’d been so good to me, offered me work when I’d needed it, standing by me through university when my shifts had to fall all over the place to accommodate my studying. They were kind and encouraging and that only made me feel more guilty, more unsure.
I called my mum, too.
“I’m so glad you saw sense!” she said. “Show them what you’re made of! I’m so proud of you, Katie. So proud.”
I told her I was staying with friends. Maybe even a special friend, and she was pleased about that, too. I wish I could have told her how things really were, how